When you're a 30-something straight dude who's already said pretty much everything he can say about The Twilight Saga: Eclipse, and a new trailer avails itself to the world on Friday afternoon, there's really only one rational way to approach it: Through the contemplative medium of poetry, seventeen syllables at a time.
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I saw Iron Man 2 last night, and while my reaction to the film is still embargoed, I can at least say that I'm bummed that the cutest scene from the first trailer (the one where Gwyneth Paltrow kisses the Iron Man helmet) is nowhere to be found in the finished product. YouTube user "reubenpac" has provided some sort of restitution for me today, going so far as to insert Iron Man into classic movie scenes he was never supposed to appear in anyway.
Before you judge the following video, imagine that you are a TV Land network executive. You are putting on your 8th Annual Award show, which no one will watch. You have created a category ("Future Classic Award") specifically to honor the hottest song-and-dance television show on the airwaves (Glee), figuring that at least the third-string cast members will show up and throw you a pity performance. But they refuse. What do you do to fill that "Don't Stop Believin'" segment that you've been planning meticulously for months?
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Michael Musto is back with a whole new episode of the Hollywood Kid, chock-full of gossip and blind items (including one I'm pretty sure I figured out...I'll wait for your confirmations in the comments). This week, Musto takes on the rumors of a warring Ridley Scott and Russell Crowe on the set of Robin Hood, talks to the director of Behind the Burly Q, and plays another provocative round of Guess Who, Don't Sue. Unless there's some sort of volcanic ash incident standing between you and your computer, why don't you some click through and see what Musto's got for you?
Movieline does not condone violence against women, but when Law & Order: SVU teases an episode in which Mariska Hargitay's character is punched in the face while going undercover as an eastern European slaughterhouse worker, I am setting my TiVo. Here are four WTF moments promised in tonight's episode "Beef," as well as the most enticing SVU promo in the show's eleven-season history.
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Angry that an over-padded American Idol bumped last night's Glee by several minutes, resulting in a DVR'd version that cut off before the musical comedy's big Madonna finale? Movieline's done you the favor of cueing up the episode right at the moment yours dropped out.
If you've ever wanted to attend your own funeral, you'll appreciate the premise of the Robert Duvall/Bill Murray comedy Get Low, which sees Duvall's character throwing a funeral party while still alive. There's just one problem: instead of eulogizing his awesome "I'm an ornery old man" beard, most people in town would rather roast the man.
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Yesterday, we introduced you to a sick-making new horror film entitled Human Centipede, and we apologize. Still, IFC made two clips from the movie available today for those of you who are brave enough to go see films where ladies are sewn together and poop into each others' mouths. (So, everyone!) I haven't even ginned up the courage to watch these clips myself yet, so you'll have to let me know what happens and whether there's a happy flashback with the cute little 3-dog.
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For sheer, head-exploding Tuesday-morning WTF-ery, I direct thee to a curious kerfuffle involving The Onion, Ain't it Cool News, and the possibly punched face of Iron Man 2 co-star Gwyneth Paltrow. Am I dense or out of touch to stare enervated at my computer for a full two minutes before asking aloud what is going on here? Read on to join the confusion -- or deliver the answers. [Spoilers follow! Maybe?]
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In the upcoming film Beastly, Mary-Kate Olsen curses handsome-but-vain Alex Pettyfer (the rising star who was just cast in I Am Number Four) with a twisted visage that teaches him that real beauty comes from within. Fortunately, there's one thing about the newly hideous, frequently shirtless Pettyfer that survives unscathed: his killer abs.
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When Dede Allen passed away Saturday at age 86 following complications from a stroke, Hollywood lost one of its most influential craftspeople of the last 50 years. While cutting films for Sidney Lumet, Arthur Penn, Paul Newman and an eclectic handful of others from John Hughes to Nick Cassavetes, Allen brought an uncanny knack for perspective and time to her work; she could make an otherwise unremarkable close-up seem positively spring-loaded based on its proximity to the shots around it and the measured use of silence. Many of her most extraordinary efforts aren't available online (e.g. the psychotic church revival in Rachel, Rachel, the foot chase in Serpico), but a few quick clips -- some better known than others -- demonstrate the talent we lost.
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Film-noir aficionados have been raving these past few days about a YouTube video called The Endless Night: A Valentine to Film Noir, made by Serena Bramble, a 20-year-old psychology student from Santa Rosa. Noir historian Eddie Muller found Bramble's video on YouTube and brought it to the big screen this past January at his Noir City festival in San Francisco. Muller showed it again this week in Los Angeles as part of Lust & Larceny: Film Noir 12th Annual Festival at the Egyptian. And now, because it's likely the coolest way to spend the next six minutes of your Friday, Movieline offers it to you.
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Michael Musto is back this week with another installment of The Hollywood Kid, and he's giving lessons to Hollywood on how to treat the press (namely: spill, and don't be afraid of it). David Duchovny, Sigourney Weaver, and Kick-Ass star Aaron Johnson are among those enrolled in the School of Musto, after which our gossip gadfly kicks off another round of "Guess Who, Don't Sue." Oh, Michael. You had me at "Rosemary's Baby blind item."
Our old friends at New Sensations are at it again, and this time they've delivered to us the trailer for their True Blood porn spoof, Tru: A XXX Parody. How do you send up a show that's already pretty racy? By playing it straight, apparently!
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Maybe I overlooked a few things or simply didn't do enough probing to understand that Eliot Spitzer is actually in Alex Gibney's new, untitled documentary about the disgraced former New York governor. Like, if I were Spitzer? And I saw the Oscar-winning investigative filmmaker behind Taxi to the Dark Side, Enron: The Smartest Guys in the Room and the upcoming Casino Jack and the United States of Money approaching my front door? I would turn off every light, close every curtain, hide beneath the bed and quite possibly consider relocating to another state under cover of night, kind of like the Colts fled Baltimore back in 1982. The last thing I would do is talk to the guy. And on camera? Forget about it. But: That's why he's Spitzer, I guess, and this first clip from Gibney's doc hints at some of the interrogation to expect.
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