George Clooney and Grant Heslov's collaborations to date have proven to be pretty hit or miss -- which bodes well for The Men Who Stare at Goats, Heslov's feature-directing debut whose new trailer either has all the film's jokes squeezed into 2:19 or at least promises a sharp absurdist satire worthy of your anticipation. Either way, what else have you got to do this morning besides watch it?
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Literary revolutionary, beat icon, heroin addict, wife-shooter, gun-lover, homosexual: I think it's safe to say that without William S. Burroughs, there would be no Jonas Brothers. Now a trailer has surfaced for William S. Burroughs: A Man Within, the "first and only posthumous documentary" on the writer from Chicago-based BulletProof Film.
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Back when all we had were eyewitness reports to go on, we figured that the trailer for Inception, Christopher Nolan's The Dark Knight follow-up, would strongly call to mind The Matrix by featuring an acrobatic, gravity-defying hallway fight scene. Now that the trailer's been released today, though, we can't stop thinking about Jurassic Park.
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The other day, when I laid eyes upon the first picture from Youth in Revolt, I begged for a costume designer to dirty Michael Cera up a little, slap on a leather jacket, or at least do something to prod Cera from his current streak of roles as hoodie-clad milquetoasts. Little did I realize that all he needed was a wispy mustache!
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With only a teaser to go on until now -- in which he announced a grassroots campaign to coax small-currency donations out of captive movie audiences to feed the distended bellies of corporate CEOs who've fallen upon hard times -- it's about time a real trailer for Michael Moore's Capitalism: A Love Story surfaced.
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Oh, Universal. Are you trying to hide your new The Wolfman trailer from the world? Did no one tell you that James Cameron would finally be unleashing the first Avatar trailer on this sleepy August Thursday, greedily gobbling up fanboy mindshare for the film that is going to forever change how we watch 3-D movies about giant, apostrophe-happy blue aliens implanted with the consciousness of Earthbound cripples? Or are you trying to sneak one by us, tucking your teaser under your arm and slipping out quietly while Avatar works the room?
Strategic decisions/oversights aside, on to the trailer itself.
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After numerous teases and fakes (one of which came awfully close to fooling even Movieline), an honest-to-goodness Avatar trailer has found its way on to the Web. Yes, it's a French import sans dialogue, but you're not here for the script anyway, right? Watch after the jump.
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Rob Zombie's 2007 Halloween reimagining did little to impress critics, who seemed disappointed that the director had chosen to abandon the steady-handed terror orchestrated by John Carpenter in favor of a messier take that sought to shed some light on Michael Myers's childhood and psychological motivations. Still, some got it -- the Village Voice's Nathan Lee called it "a biopic, and a superb one at that... Zombie's portrait is every bit as reverent, scrupulous, and deeply felt as any Oscar grubbing horrorshow." Despite expressing reluctance to return to the material, Zombie's sequel arrives in theaters next week.
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The actual English-language trailer for New Moon has been released, and I have to say, I actually preferred the French-dubbed bootleg. There, the mystifying choice to let Taylor Lautner narrate the entire clip was balanced out by his sophisticated French; in English, though, he simply sounds like an overzealous disc jockey. But hey! There's Dakota Fanning, right?
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Sometimes, after I've watched a great deal of trailers back to back, I'll briefly forget what film I'm actually at the theater to see. My guess is that the endless trailer for the Kristen Bell romantic comedy When in Rome might induce the same effect, as it's pretty much guaranteed to be longer than the actual movie you've bought a ticket to.
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Hey, here's something that had been off my radar til now: Gentlemen Broncos, the next movie from Napoleon Dynamite director Jared Hess. A new trailer has been released for the film and it looks like Napoleon all right, but with Flight of the Conchords' Jemaine Clement added in for good measure.
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The new trailer for Law Abiding Citizen is out, pitting vigilante Gerard Butler against prosecutor Jamie Foxx in a battle of wills from which no one shall emerge unscathed. Or maybe "unscathed" isn't the right word -- perhaps we should go with unexploded, or untortured, or un-power-tooled, or any of the other variety of ways the bereft Butler's psycho-revenge plot takes on the criminal justice system in Philadelphia.
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1. Uma Thurman isn't simply a harried mom trying to adjust to the multitude of demands on her schedule -- she's also a blogger with a site called "The Bjorn Identity." At some point, we've got to believe the marketing team is going to sell this puppy based on three shots alone: Thurman typing, butter sizzling in a pan, and, oddly, Julia Child cooking beef bourguignon.
2. Jodie Foster has an uncredited cameo as herself, for some reason.
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"The End is Near! The Apocalypse is coming! But forget horsemen and Endtime Rulers and all that. It's actually going to play itself out a lot like Bagdad Café (the movie version, not the Whoopi Goldberg TV adaptation), and Paul Bettany is going to lead the fight against an army of demon ice cream truck drivers and foul-mouthed grannyzebubs as Dennis Quaid's skin boils while he's nailed upside down to a cross and his whole torso explodes. And there's going to be guns. Lots and lots of guns! Thank god Dr. Addison Montgomery is there -- she can help deliver the savior baby! Did you ever notice how much black-winged angels look like bats when flying in formation?"
Verdict: What happens when that guy in the Denny's parking lot wearing a discarded bra on his head and screaming at the top of his lungs sells his first screenplay.
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When I worked at a video store in college, one of my favorite things to do was to put a really cheesy DVD on the big TV but turn on English subtitles and French dubbing. Like clockwork, shoppers would stop to stare, wondering what sophisticated foreign film they had just discovered, before the sudden, jarring presence of Mariah Carey would alert them that it was Glitter.
All this is to say that the new, full-length trailer for New Moon seems custom-made for me: this isn't the 14-second snippet, nor the actual English trailer, but instead a French-dubbed version somebody videotaped. Can the foreign language ameliorate the story's inherent cheesiness?
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