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5 Ways to Make the Proposed Ramones Biopic Work

Fox Searchlight is reportedly circling a project based on the life, times and influence of punk's founding fathers the Ramones. On one hand, this isn't really any different than a toy or comic-book adaptation designed to move millions of dollars' worth of merchandise to a new generation of jaded filmgoers. On the other, a Ramones film has potential! Consider five key ways this movie might be able to outmaneuver cynicism on its way to viewers hearts:
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Roman Polanski Doc Filmmaker 'Perplexed,' 'Astonished' Over Lying Source

It came as more than a little bit of a surprise Wednesday when a critical source in the documentary Roman Polanski: Wanted and Desired said he'd fabricated his story about judicial misconduct in Roman Polanksi's rape case. Polanski supporters swung back as predicted, speculating about the strange timing of David Wells's announcement and theorizing about what (or who) turned him over while Polanski battles extradition in Switzerland. Wanted and Desired filmmaker Marina Zenovich was especially curious, and she put her thoughts about the matter in writing today. Her statement follows the jump.
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Michael Bay Officially At Work on Transformers 3

Candy muse and tentpole kingpin Michael Bay took to his blog this morning to announce that work on Transformers 3 is officially underway. It's even got a release date: July 1, 2011. And best of all, he's buried the hatchet with leading lady/quasi-archnemesis Megan Fox: "I promise no alien robots will harm you in any way during the production of this motion picture. Please consult your Physician when working under my direction because some side effects can occur, such as mild dizziness, intense nausea, suicidal tendencies, depression, minor chest hair growth, random internal hemorrhaging and inability to sleep. As some directors may be hazardous to your health, please consult your Doctor to determine if this is right for you." That goes for you, too, gentle viewer. Otherwise, rejoice! [MichaelBay.com]

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Buzz Break: Hot Date, Hot Mess

· Pictures like this one (click through for full-size) get us excited for the Steve Carell/Tina Fey matchup Date Night, so we're just going to pretend for now that it isn't being directed by Shawn Levy. La-la-la, not listening...

· NBC has snagged a script about married spies from J.J. Abrams and Josh Reims.

· 30 Rock may have surpassed its disappointing ratings story in the U.S., but overseas, it's the same hard sell.

· Quentin Tarantino would much rather talk about sequels to his films than actually make them, so enjoy the very hypothetical resuscitation of Kill Bill 3.

· Via Ausiello comes this clip of Tyra Banks on Gossip Girl that really must be seen to be believed. I'm not smizing with her, I'm smizing at her.

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Mo' Money, Mo' Problems

Since Sundance, Mo'Nique has been seen as a mortal lock to earn a supporting actress nomination for her harrowing performance in Precious. Unfortunately, that's also the last time she promoted the movie, and the film's had several high-profile festival bows since. Roger Friedman alleges that the actress won't show up for the film unless she's getting paid, and is cycling through publicists who throw up their hands at that somewhat unconventional awards season strategy. Mo', when you're in a film with Mariah Carey and you're being called the diva, things may have gone a little awry. [Showbiz 411]

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In Honor of James Franco Joining the Cast of General Hospital: Five Other Superstar Soap Cameos

James Franco is many things -- movie star, fashion model, Ivy Leaguer, Queer cinema academic. And now he's something else: A soap opera actor. Not just any soap, mind you, but General Hospital. The AP reports he'll play "a mystery person" who arrives at Port Charles in an arc that lasts approximately two months, beginning November 20th. Says EP Jill Farren Phelps: "It's an honor that an actor of Franco's caliber would choose to spend some of his valuable time in Port Charles." Is he Lucy Coe's illegitimate son? Bobby Spencer's new boytoy? The man who broke up Luke and Laura? We just don't know. Because we haven't watched General Hospital since the '80s. (And also -- it's a mystery! It says it right there in his character description!)
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Bravo for Spinoffs

Bravo has announced plans for three spinoff series. Project Runway winner Christian Siriano will front a show about setting up a shop and marketing a clothing line, Real Housewives of New York star Bethenny Frankel's project will concern her career as natural foods chef and love life, and Top Chef contestant Fabio Viviani's series will document his new restaurant in Los Angeles. Thus far only Viviani's show has a title, Fabio: A Catered Affair. Are these guys really good to enough to step into the solo-project shoes of Tim Gunn, Jay McCarroll, and, uh, Jo de la Rosa? OK, five yards of bargain seersucker from Mood Fabrics is better than Jo. [Variety]

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Art or Child Pornography?: The Brooke Shields Portrait That Shook Britain

As fugitive filmmaker Roman Polanski awaits extradition to an increasingly unsympathetic U.S., yet another front has opened in the raging Culture War that has subsumed continents and turned megaproducing brother against megaproducing brother. This one blitzed London with a bombshell image of a 10-year-old Brooke Shields hanging from gallery walls -- covered in baby oil, standing nude in a bathtub, with a face full of makeup.
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How the Weinsteins Lost Precious

The L.A. Times has mapped out the e-mail trail between the Weinstein Company and sales agents for Precious, revealing some of the most fantastically desperate posturing in the history of Sundance bidding wars. "I just got off the phone with Harvey and I am glad to confirm that we have a deal," wrote TWC's international distribution boss, whom producer's rep Bart Walker attempted to straighten out multiple times as negotiations continued with eventual buyer Lionsgate. Lawsuits and countersuits soon followed, of course, finally fading with a judge's dismissal this week -- just when Harvey had made room on his shelf and everything. He'll get 'em next time. [LAT]

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Hugh Jackman Gets in the Robotic Ring with Real Steel

· Hugh Jackman is in talks to star in Real Steel, director Shawn Levy's tale of an ex-boxer who must reinvent himself when the boxing circuit is overrun with 2,000-pound robots. In doing so, he becomes a Robot Boxing promoter who restores a mechanized fighter from the junk heap. The underdog battles toward a championship while Jackman's character bonds with the 13-year-old son he never knew he had. Who knew that the sweet spot between Million Dollar Baby and Transformers could be so very, very sweet? [Variety]

Jamie Foxx and Josh Brolin jump aboard new projects, Comcast denies peacock ownership, and more Hollywood Ink after the jump.

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When Betty Draper Met the Maverick

· A wave of fear swept through the Capitol today, after a heartfelt plea from January Jones to pass the Shark Conservation Act was greeted by John McCain with the observation, "Does anybody else in here smell oranges?"
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Liquidation Sale

Is NBC-Universal about to change hands from General Electric to cable monolith Comcast? That's what The Wrap is reporting, saying a "a deal had already been completed at a purchase price of $35 billion." (Coincidentally, the same sum they reported Nikki Finke had netted on the sale of Deadline Hollywood Daily.) Obviously, this raises a lot of questions. Will NBC be forced to vacate its home at the G.E. Building, leading its Emmy Award-winning Thursday night sitcom to be renamed 1 Comcast Center? Will Universal produce movies that cut out intermittently, but still charge exorbitant monthly fees for the privilege of watching them? Developing... [The Wrap]

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Roman Polanski's Star Defense Witness: 'I Lied'

Forget everything you've heard about Roman Polanski's defense strategy -- the corrupt judge, the documentary expose, the motion to dismiss the 30-year old case, the international celebrity outcry over his arrest and detention in Switzerland, Humbert Humbert's plea for leniency, and everything else working to clear a path for the filmmaker to finally move on to his post-fugitive golden years. A wild new development calls for Plan B, or a white flag, or Rolaids, or whatever it is you reach for when your most important witness admits says he made his whole story up.
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The Green Hornet Costume Revealed!

Splash News shot some video from the set of Michel Gondry's The Green Hornet (we've got it below the jump) and captured in the footage appears to be a first look at the Hornet's costume, here modeled by a stand-in or stuntman for Seth Rogen. Frankly, I don't know what to think -- hadn't we all decided as a nation that superhero costumes were supposed to conform to a body-hugging, nipple-embellishing S&M influence? Those that don't are supposed to go gritty and dark a la The Dark Knight, but the Hornet is positively day-glo. I feel I should be dipping a brush in those colors and puffy painting a campaign poster for fifth-grade class treasurer.
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