WATCH: Noomi Rapace Doesn't Move Anything Like Jagger In New Rolling Stones Video

Rolling Stones Video Noomi Rapace

Ahem. So, if you could just take your eyes off Noomi Rapace's naked breasts for a damn second, I'd like to ask you a question. Is it me  or is the Prometheus star a terrible dancer?   Compelling actor, yes — with a face that demands my attention every time she's on screen. But check out that weird kind of heaving motion she makes when she's imitating Mick Jagger in Jonas Akerlund's music video for "Doom and Gloom."  What the hell is that?

I mean, every two-bit stand-up comic beginning with Richard Belzer (remember when he was funny?)  can imitate Jagger's rooster strut, but Rapace seems to be having a hard time even getting in sync with the music. (In a way, I  don't blame her. This song may be on the band's latest greatest hits collection, but it ain't great, even if it becomes a hit.)

And then there's that Flashdance-like scene where you can't really tell if it's her or a stand-in.  (Have You Seen Your Stand-In Baby, Standing in the Shadow?)   Maybe that's some kind of ironic take on the fact that Jennifer Beals had a stand-in for her dance scenes in the original.

The quick-cutting is another clue.  You would think that shots of Rapace dancing in a Stones video would be a selling point. Okay, maybe not as big a draw as her bare breasts, but sensual enough that the camera would be lingering a little longer as she lets her freak flag fly.

Unless it was a little too freaky.

What do you think?  Let me know in the comments section.

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  • Andy says:

    Not great? Boy, did you miss the boat on this one. That's the best Rolling Stones song I've heard in YEARS! Sounds like classic Stones from the 60s. It's been stuck in my head since the first time I heard it.

    And what's with all this crap about Noomi Rapace can't dance? Or imitate Mick? She might be dancing for a total of about 5 seconds in this video, and never once did I see her trying to ape Jagger.

      • Andy says:

        WHAT is your point exactly? Did you even read what I said? I am NOT agreeing with you. I am, in fact, DISAGREEING with you. You're an idiot. I would complain to the Editorial Director of this site about your unprofessionalism, but – unbelievably – that person is you.

  • Tyler D. says:

    I must agree with Andy above, that is a terrific song. Don't understand at all why you didn't like it. Nor why you called your article "Noomi Rapace Doesn't Move Anything Like Jagger In New Rolling Stones Video"? I never saw her try, Mick does his own dancing here, that is SO not the point, and yet you not only bring it up, you entitle your article with it?

    Stick to entertainment news, Frank, as a music critic you have no idea what you are talking about. You sound like a "Hater Troll" … and since when do they write for reputable film sites?

  • qwnjn says:

    This article is *bleep*ing retarded.
    Noomi dances for all of 3 seconds in the rain, and it's mesmorizingly beautiful.

    Article writer is probably a jealous girl or a fat troll.

  • Chris Tasse says:

    Yeah, the author of this article...I'll spare myself even scrolling up to check his name, doesn't get it regarding either the music or the dancing. First off, like most Stones fans, I consider myself a bit of an authority, and I can tell you, usually it takes a little while before I am sure if I totally dig a new song of theirs, because they are SO effing good, and always longer in the tooth, I tend to not want to be easy, if you will, and just jump on the bandwagon. But DOOM AND GLOOM draws you right the hell in, like ROUGH JUSTICE did, off A BIGGER BANG. And I was damn glad, as EVER, to hear them still spot on with what's going on in the world and giving a shite regardless of how damn monied they are.

    I'll admit I had a half second's thought regarding the youtube version, cut up and censored, as to her stilted looking moves, and because they quick cut or show Mick appearing right after or over her at one point, I get the connection the author made regarding trying to dance like him, but I think it is a misconception. They obviously chose her because of her looks--beautiful and scarey a little, a little tough--to go with the whole we are headed for a world of shite theme, but screw it, we know what you are trying to do to us, pumping fear at us 24/7. And with the whole zombie theme I kind of think she was channeling that, if anything. Plus Mick controls every aspect of the staging, visuals, etc...and with his inner Goddess in the Doorway, if you will, the overlay of her and him was just some little ode to his inner Tina Turner Jones.

    I'll leave it at this, as to the music; I first came upon them in '78, did my catching up everyday between two stereo speakers after 8th and 9th grade school days, singing and dancing non stop at first to the entire Hot Rocks collection, then digging deeper. Caught them live in 81-82, and at least one or two shows every North American Tour since, Detroit, L.A., San Diego, etc. AND MY POINT IS, in '89 Guns N Roses was the hot new band, and they were to warm up for the boys in L.A., and I took this gal who begged my new kid in town ass along, who wanted to see Faith No More, the first warm up band. This young punk (I was only 24, but) behind me in his Guns N Roses T-shirt (the second warm up act) kept putting his foot against my seat, and I had to set his behind straight--I didn't pay scads of bucks to have some fool monkey with my experience--and after Axl made a fool of himself as well, screaming about bandmates "Dancing with Mr. Brownstone", heroin or whatever, i.e. he might quit if they didn't...and shouting the N word and saying Spics and the like, and dancing horribly and falling off the stage like an idiot...I still had that momentary wonderment, would the boys still kick butt after seven years absent, could they be better than the hot new band, live.

    Well...They came out, played for ten or twenty minutes pure kick butt R&R, Mick then said, "I think Axl said enough, so we'll just play", and the jerk behind me's pal, who I half wondered would he jump in if I had to clock his buddy, turned out to be a Stones fan, too, and he said, laughing, "Ha Ha, yeah, Don't Fuc# with The Stones!". The girl, all of 19, turned to me later, glassy and starry eyed, and said, "I really wanted to see Faith No More, and Guns was okay on some stuff, so so on others, live...but the Stones are a BAND...I can hear EVERY INSTRUMENT, THANK YOU FOR TAKING ME TO THIS CONCERT".

    DOOM AND GLOOM did nothing to disprove this fact, nearly a quarter of a century AFTER THAT. Screw you, whoever wrote this. You just don't get it, and you likely never will. Too bad for you.

  • Pillin says:

    Article writer needs to retire.
    That was some beautiful dancing.
    Let's see his fat @ss get out there