Is This Jake Gyllenhaal's Penis? A Movieline Investigation

It's currently cratering at the box office, but Love and Other Drugs was supposed to be a return to the full-throated, unabashedly erotic films of yesterday, akin to movies like Last Tango in Paris and 9 1/2 Weeks that proudly wore its sexual sizzle on its sleeve. And while we get a faceful of Anne Hathaway's front and back, Jake Gyllenhaal only provides an ass shot. But now a still from the movie is making the rounds online, and it seems like Jake Jr. might have made a cameo after all. The (obviously NSFW) picture after the jump.

Here's how it seems without only minimal digital tinkering:

gyllenhaal_penis3.gif

And now here it is with the contrast cranked up to 11:

gyllenhaal_penis3.gif

Ladies and gentlemen, that looks like a penis to me. BUT! Is it really Jake's junk or did some Photoshop savvy prankster drop it in there? I say let's go full-Zapruder and take a look at a GIF of the todger-centric clip in question.

gyllenhaal_penis3.gif

Hmmm...This complicates matters. Frankly, now I'm not sure if it's not just a fold of the sheet that gives the illusion of it being Gyllenhaal's gully-digger. It seems to me like Anne definitely makes contact with something fleshy, but based on the position of his body I'm not positive it's Jake's John Thomas. But if it is him, then Jake is hung like a bull moose and I worry for the safety and sanctity of Taylor Swift's maidenhead.

What do you think, gentle reader? Is this Jake's Gyllen-willy or just a cruel hoax?



Comments

  • Melissa says:

    In the video it's a wrinkled bedsheet. The picture is faked.

  • Sam says:

    Katy, it is laughable that you think you know what Jake's sexuality is. You are the one who sounds fake.

  • godzilla_foil says:

    I'd say it's real. Check this out:
    http://www.errorlevelanalysis.com/permalink/3540cae/
    Only the enhanced circle is shown as photoshopped intrusion.

  • G says:

    This would be the most commented upon story on Movieline.

  • MastreMahem says:

    Your fascination with the dudes member is demented. Get yourself to the nearest hospital and don't come out till you've adapted to the adult world, you infantile pathetic dimwit. P.S. Anne's got a GREAT ASS!!!

  • gavin says:

    she totally bumps into his dick when she brings her hand up to caress his stomach. you can clearly see it. take another look!

  • Mikey says:

    I say big toe, right foot.

  • Mortaryan says:

    Sorry to break the heart of all you gay guys hot for Jake...but there is no one Eyed in the picture or the clip, the thing is nothing more than a blanket fold...it's on the wrong side of Ann's leg...just goes to show people can see what they want to see...a classic example of mass hysteria.
    Frankly, what is truly magnificent about these pictures and the clip is the shot of Ann's perfect ass which is, well...magnificent.

  • ERock says:

    Wait, this movie was supposed to be erotic? They really missed the mark with commercials and trailers, it looked like a cheesy romantic comedy.
    And yeah, that looks like a hog But I didn't pay too much attention since I was distracted by that goddess of an ass on Mz. Hathaway.

  • top says:

    So how many ways can a "journalist" describe a penis?

  • Luke Nutley says:

    It certainly looks like a penis but it also certainly looks uncircumcised (but retracted) which means it's not Jake's penis as he's a Jew and was circumcised at birth. Better luck next time, boys.

  • Madeleine says:

    The pictures look somewhat believable, but the clip makes it very very obvious it's just the table behind them.

  • LOL says:

    OMG! People actually think that's Big??? LOL.

  • MM says:

    Definately it is. Can you have doubt on something seen by your actual naked eyes???????????????

  • mumu0 says:

    thats the linen

  • Tiberius says:

    How about this one? You can definitely see in between Anne's legs
    http://i.imgur.com/zEAch.jpg

  • ErnieCoolKat says:

    Who cares just bury it please!! :-P

  • Aside from the fact that it's clear that the bedsheet fold is the culprit, I'm surprised no one has mentioned the fact that in movies like this, actors wear a "modesty patch" that cups and covers their penis and testicles.

    Aside from giving the actor some privacy, it saves everything from being out there the whole time, with so many takes and cuts and between shot time.

  • Fastidious response in return of this query with solid arguments and telling everything on the topic of that.

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