Real Housewives of New York Reality Check: Jill Zarin vs. the World

Last week on the Housewives of New York City, Bethenny taught a little class called "Selling the Sh*t Out Of An Apology For Socialites." This week, the SkinnyGirl was chained to a Pepperidge Farm street cart, where she shamelessly plugged the 100 calorie bread, and her toilet, where she shamelessly plugged her surprise pregnancy. Meanwhile, Alex pulled off her Brooklyn fashion show, Kelly worked the runway in an unflattering Big Bird dress, LuAnn toured Central Park in a rickshaw fueled by condescension, and a new housewife named Sonja introduced herself as Martin Scorsese's neighbor. But the most awe-inspiring moments from last night's installment came courtesy of Jill Zarin, who demonstrated that she can go from loving wife to petty bitch in the blink of the eye -- or in a swooshy Bravo edit. So pour yourself a Ramona-sized glass of pinot grigio and click through for the truest and fakest moments of last night's episode, "New Girl, Old Money."

REAL: Jill's Barely-Masked Anger

HousewivesSonja585.jpg

In a few short seasons, Jill Zarin has gone from the show's comic relief to just another housewife villain, whose wrath is incited by as little as 160 characters ("Did you not Twitter [Bethenny] a kiss-ass message saying, 'It was so great to be with you the other day?' That really pissed me off.") Instead of trying to rationalize Jill's barely concealed rage, let's recap the insults:

· "When I arrived at Fashion Week in Brooklyn, I was horrified. It was so low-rent. The [red carpet] was next to a heap...of trash. I'm speechless."

· "The Countess wouldn't have been caught dead at anything Alex and Simon would do but I think that LuAnn would have pulled up with her driver and kept driving."

· (Playing on Ramona's insecurities minutes before the fashion show) "I don't think that necklace goes with that. It doesn't go with it. It's blue!"

· (Playing on Ramona's insecurities minutes before the fashion show) "Is that bra supposed to show?"

· "I was so overdressed. I should have been in a wife-beater and jeans. I felt like a moron. I just couldn't wait for the show to be over so I could get out of there."

· "When Ramona walked [onto the runway], she looked like an alien invaded her body. She walks like a robot with her neck stuck out like a giraffe and her eyes are bulging. She looked like an idiot."

· "These chairs are so uncomfortable. I'm dying."

· When Alex walked out, I really expected a lot. She has the body of a fashion model -- maybe not the face -- but I really expected a lot. When she walked out though, she looked like she was channeling the devil."

In short, Jill's unhappiness was very real.

FAKE: Jill Does Not Hate New Housewife Sonja Morgan Yet

HousewivesSonja585.jpg

Last night, Bravo threw another New York housewife into the mix: Sonja Morgan, or as she calls herself "Single Sonja, Upper East Sider, neighbor of Scorsese, townhouse owner with an elevator, believer in surgical procedures and sex." Unfortunately for Sonja, she has already aligned herself with LuAnn, the Ice Queen of New York City, and quickly lost sympathy with viewers when she offered to give up old $3,000 jackets from her Colorado closet for LuAnn's charity ("I have a closet for every place I have a home in.")

And the only thing that Jill could say about Sonja was, "My first impression of Sonja was I thought she was very pretty. I did. I think she is a very pretty lady."

Really, Jill? Don't play us.



Comments

  • Lisa says:

    Here I go:
    Jill: You are a bitch! Two-faced, double crossing, inauthentic and you are soooo fake. I couldn't dislike anyone more. Sad, last season you were my favorite, this season you are a piece of shit. That's who you really are. It's truly disgusting. I hate this season because of you.
    LuAnn: Ick! You are so lame and such a whore for popularity. You will agree with whoever you think is most popular. Revolting. But more than that, you are soooo boring. Oh my God, you lack depth and personality, no wonder your husband left you. Also, money can't buy you talent, class or all of things you think you have! Stuck up, boring as hell old lady.
    Kelly: You are so stupid. I mean "like" truly dumb. So, you're an editor? Of what? Hard to believe you can edit anything, since you speak like a 12 year old. You use your looks to get you by, but you are an empty void. I can't even dislike you because I nothing you.
    Sonja: Who the fuck are you? Why are you on the show? Get off the show, you don't belong.
    Alex: Love you! You are a good person with a level head and what you did to Jill...the bitch had it and more coming. I find you intelligent, kind and sensible. Wow, a like a cool breeze on a hot day. You do need to go apeshit on Jill though. Stop holding back. I would love to see you completely let loose and not let her get away with her bithcy, junior high behavior.
    Bethenny: Love you too! You can be snarky and speak with a forked tongue, that is clearly your personality and I love that. Congrats on your new and way better life.

  • Lora says:

    Wow, for one who "doen't want to be in the drama" as Jill says, she sure creates enough of it. Jill is self-centered, unhappy, and needs to be the center of all attention.
    Go Team Bethenny. Most of us knew Jill would regret her tantrum and game playing against Bethenny. Bethenny extended the olive branch, Jill refused. Bethenny retreated and Jill obviously didn't expect it so soon. Stay away Bethenny.....far away. Let Luann continue to be Jill's puppet. Jill would rather have Bethenny over any other, but alas, she must settle for Luann and the others.
    Good for you Alex! Maybe delivering the message was not appropriate, but none of the Housewives are free from poor judgement. It is just one more thing Jill will continue to cry about and pales in comparison to her digs and nastiness. Go Alex, Go Bethenny, and I hope Sonia doesn't become contaminated by Jill by falling for her fakeness and pretend kindness and friendship.

  • Nancy says:

    I just want to make one remark. Unless the whole show is staged? Why can't Jill remember ambushing Bethenny after Kelly attacked her in the restaurant. Kelly loves being late, she made Bethenny wait over an hour and then Kelly tells Bethenny she doesn't like her. Jill had Kelly come to her apt without telling Bethenny she was there! Did Jill forget about THAT ambush she instigated herself? So Ramona tried to heal their friendship once again; and Jill continues to say she was ambushed? Does anyone remember that ambush between Kelly and Bethenny?
    Jills got nerve and a really bad memory! Have a happy life without her Bethenny.

  • LORRAINE says:

    THE ONLY THING THAT I CAN SAY IS THAT JILL IS SOOOO UGLY AND SHE HAS NO CLASS, HAVE YOU SEEN HER HAUSE!! MY GOOD IT LOOK'S LIKE A CHEEP MAFIA HAUSE!!! AND WHAT'S UP WITH THAT TRAVESTI THAT FOLLOWS HER EVERYWHERE... KELLY

  • jakey says:

    You are soooo toxic ... You create your own drama ... Why don't you freaking let go already !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Sharon says:

    Hi Samantha,
    Did you ever find out what dress Jill was wearing at Central park with LuAnne?

  • Susan Smythe says:

    Alex? Are you kissing your own ass again? LOL Alex DOES channel the devil, it's terrifying to watch her thin-lipped face. Living in that horrid house with blood red walls with the creepiest of all husbands....oh yuck. I think you should STAY in Brooklyn where you belong and leave the Upper East Side alone. They don't need or want your hanger-on desperateness. Alex is in love with Bethenny......she just keeps driving that wedge between Bethenny and Jill, who are really sisters at heart and need to just make up, so that she can have someone to cling to who might be going somewhere.
    But I do feel sorry for Bethenny's guy....she's going to get angry at him some day and just cut him down with her sharp tongue and he's going to look at her and wonder why he's with this sarcastic hag.
    Jill went out of her way to help Alex before, helping to get her sons into a school in Manhattan, helping to include that wannabe Alex into the city social scene. No good deed goes unpunished.
    Kelly doesn't understand or grasp sarcasm. She truly believes the words that Bethenny's SAYS and misses the sarcastic tones, she just doesn't seem to understand that when Bethenny says "yeah right like I planned to murder her" that she might not really be saying she plans to murder her but is being glib. Kelly is certifiable. Bethenny should truly just keep quiet around her and give her lots of space. it's not a safe scenario.
    Sonja is funny. She's a sexy slut with money, class, and a girls-just-wanna-have-fun attitude and she seems to be the only one who really SEES what is really going on with all the loonies she's not hooked up with.
    LuAnn. (sigh). Honey, stop trying so hard to pretend. Just cry. Be real. You're hurt. Your husband, the count (eye roll), left you for another woman. But you truly are more than just an ex-countess...you have potential but you need to let down your guard and that fake trying too hard to pretend it's all okay BS and just be the quiet, elegant woman you are.
    Ramona? Love you. Crazy eyed nut job but so honestly just herself, who cares? Ramona is Ramona. As flamboyant and extreme as she is, she's real. And Ramona....honey, Alex is still the pig who couldn't wait to show her boobs on that magazine that you thought was so disgusting. She's not your real friend. She is just a leech. Put a match to her and pull her blood-sucking, life-sucking evil fakeness off you, girl.

  • TruthBTold says:

    Hey wasn't Susan Smythe, one of the early posts here that bashed everyone but Jill, one of Jill's aliases for reviewing her own book well and Bethenny's book badly on Amazon?? Why yes it was LOL Jill you can't get away with it anymore, we're on to you.

  • Blondebabe says:

    I am so glad that others agree about Jill. Her personality is only alive when she is in control...or thinks she is. I doubt I have ever watched a more insecure person in her position. She has a tremendous business sense and could have had many lovely friendships...but, I bet her biz is going down a bit, thus the mula...and her book? Who the hell would buy it? PALEEZE! Then, the friendship thing? She can't be a true friend...she is needy but tries to pretend that she is strong. There is nothing to gain in befriending Jill...she offers nothing but conditional relationships. Kelley? For pete's sakes! She needs to be admitted into a psych ward...or drug ward...whichever if not both. The cat pee smell? Look it up...meth. Then, the lollipops? Meth...look it up. Although on today's re-run, she was at the bar with Sonya, THE COUNTESS (lol) and she stated that someone, family?...thought that she was bipolar. So...I think whomever it was got it wrong and that it's a combo but the psych part is more SKITZO? Ok...well, jmo...and the rest of them? Fun. I love Betthany...she is amazingly funny and has been thru hell. Having been thru that drama with all the witches and then on the boat and then the home on the island? Poor thing! I hope security was there. It's my understanding that Kelley had to be taken care of by the crew until 3am because she was rolling in the bed crying and psychotic. So? Guess the ratings went up...but, heck...sometimes, it's just better to get rid of those dangerous ones that IMO could loose everything in life and possibly hurt someone. Nice talking to you all!

  • Blondebabe says:

    One more thing...I adore Sonya. What a breath of fresh air. Just what the show needs...thanks to Kel and Jill for being such downers. To be so honest about her own downfalls and not pretentous, but owning up to the fact that she has what she has and is proud of it...I like her alot! Looking forward to seeing her unfold more of her private life. Interesting person for sure. Barbara Streisand move over...this lady looks like her...but is sooooooo much prettier. :)

  • Blondebabe says:

    Oops...Sonya got a DUI in NY on Memorial Day. What happened to her driver? Is it for the show only?

  • Lucy says:

    Jill is the hight school bully....Kelly still thinks she's a cute 16 yr old......needs to dress her age and stop showing her hiney. Ick

  • Tess says:

    Jill, Is that you again?

  • Lala says:

    Oh god, stop bashing Jill. Everyone gets in bad situations and makes mistakes. This will all pass and you will be (hopefully) hating Alex soon enough.

  • jeri says:

    I think bethenyis the greatest wish I had a friend like her want to see more of her and her wonderful family congrats to both of you I to han a wonderfull husband.sd.

  • Darlene says:

    I am so dissapointed in Jill. She has become everything she indicates she cannot stand in others. The ironic part is Jill knows she is disliked immensely; has horrible reviews; but just doesn't know how to fix it. Her staff definitely can't get it together for her either...something definitely wrong!!! Your pours ooze FAKE, PHONY AND MALICIOUS. But you know that. We see it in your face everytime you are on TV. You have gotten to a point where you can't help yourself or you don't want to help yourself.

Post a Comment

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s