On the Wings of Famewhoredom: A Bachelor Finale Analysis


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2) Jake and Vienna: Marital Takeoff!

Louis: They will find the sex intriguing and full of neat challenges at first! Then who cares, these two are ciphers. It may work for awhile, but I could see them being plenty more interested in other people.

Julie: I think his Dancing with the Stars move is going to ruin their relationship unless she finds her own project right away. But she is supposed to move immediately, right? Isn't that what she said during the After the Final Rose ceremony?

Louis: Yes, yes. Joining DWTS seems a bit telling.

Julie: OK, this might be getting off-topic, but my favorite moment in every finale is when the Bachelor picks out the ring that he is not paying for before he knows who he is proposing to.

Louis: That is always touching. Especially since there are, what, four rings? A real debacle.

Julie: And the jeweler tries to talk him through it and provide counsel.

Louis: Why was that jeweler like a shady tea-kettle merchant at a bazaar? "AHA! Tell me about this girl of yours." Jafar? At any rate, Jake and Vienna are over before they began.

Julie: Yes. This is a mutually unfulfilling relationship for two wannabe celebrities.

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