Movieline Counterpoint: How To Make A Second Season Of Jersey Shore Work
The Fish-In-Similar-Water Solution: The Jersey Shore Vs. Southie
A knee-jerk thought upon getting an initial taste of The Shore was that MTV should immediately franchise out to Southie, doing the same lightly exploitative service for any proud, self-identifying Massholes they can find that they'd just done for Guido Nation. So it makes perfect sense to swaddle our original cast in Yankee paraphernalia, ship them up to Boston, and let them loose on Red Sox turf. With liquor-fueled fist-fights rising by an estimated 300 percent, MTV will have all the watercooler moments it can handle. (And, in all likelihood, nightly riots.)
The Take-It-On-The-Road Solution: The Shore On Tour
Through its Road Rules series, MTV has vast expertise in moving busloads of drunken attention-whores from town to town, so it would be a small matter to fire up one of their decommissioned RR vehicles (with a fresh, Ed Hardy-branded paint job, preferably of a crystal-encrusted dragon vomiting up Cointreau-tinted fire), stock it full of booze, and take The Shore straight to America. In between cities, the close quarters and lack of privacy should spark fresh conflict between our road-weary Guidos, with The Situation constantly tweaking Vinny about how loud he groans while getting his smoosh on in a cramped sleeping compartment.
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Comments
Italy or bust.
I got it!
next year -
-Sammy picks up Morgellen Syndrome off some fuckin' bug at the beach
-Situation discovers scat play
-Snookie late term abortion
-black guido found
I have an idea: how about NOT saving this horrible show. These are the stupidest people on the planet, and MTV is making them famous by showcasing their stupidity. Go America. Way to show some class. I hope I never hear another blurb about Jersey Shore or any of these idiots.
What scumbags. Sorry. Call me a snob. The girls on this show look like sluts who need to bathe, and the boys look like they are all sexually confused morons who confuse body art and hideous hair with good taste. They are all what is so embarrassing about America. The worst our country has produced are these low-life morons.
I love the use of bluescreen here in a vain attempt to make those Guidos a bit more classy, though Paulie's Marinara Warehouse is probably a little miffed over the lost publicity.
Not just a catchy screenname for you, eh?
You should also not check out Big Brother, that one has tons of dumbies.