Kris Allen's Single is Dying Like It's Dying
Sad news for fans of puppy-looking dudes everywhere: American Idol's last winner Kris Allen, Randy Jackson's onetime cherished "tender dog," is having a rough go on iTunes this week with his new single "Live Like We're Dying." The rollicking, campfire-friendly, Gavin Degraw-conjuring song drops to #58 on the singles chart this week, ranking somewhere down there with that godforsaken "You're a Jerk" number and probably the 12-years-strong "My Heart Will Go On." Now, a stillborn Idol single wouldn't necessary be news unless there was also a strange Idol triumph to counteract it, right? Strap on your puffy album-cover dress-thing, because one Idol contestant may be pulling ahead far after the polls have closed.
According to Amazon, the as-yet-untitled Adam Lambert album, which doesn't drop until November 24, is at #2 on the Amazon Bestsellers List. Phenomenally, the Idol runner-up's label RCA and Amazon had yet to even release a statement about pre-order availability. Currently he's ranked only behind Barbra Streisand and in front of Susan Boyle, which means he has proven himself a beacon of glitter-slathered hope for 57-to-62-year-olds everywhere. Somewhere in a luxurious grotto filled with gyrating holograms of Leona Lewis, Simon Cowell snickers and cries, knowing his childhood dream of breeding a pop star from the well-costumed genes of Butch Patrick and Jo Anne Worley is complete.