Adam Lambert Confirms the Obvious: Drugs Made Him Join Idol
So this man, this Adam Lambert man, is on the cover of Rolling Stone now. Did we know this was going to happen? Hmmm, perhaps we had some sort of advance warning or something, but I only understand the language of Lambert when it's communicated in a hair-raising wail that's equal parts G'n'R emulation and phlegm. So what do we learn?
· "I don't think it should be a surprise for anyone to hear that I'm gay," he says, though we shouldn't expect him to become a civil rights leader. "Right after the finale, I almost started talking about it to the reporters, but I thought, 'I'm going to wait for Rolling Stone, that will be cooler,'" he says, which is true: there is nothing cooler than a confession of obvious sexuality nestled in between a tour update of Phish and a five-star Rob Sheffield review of Steely Dan's new album. "I didn't want the Clay Aiken thing and the celebrity-magazine bullshit. I need to be able to explain myself in context."
· Also, he joined American Idol after a psychedelic-fueled drug epiphany at Burning Man, which I think is how it happened for Tamyra Gray.
· He wanted to bang Kris Allen. Well, who didn't? "I was like, `Oh, (bleep), they [roomed] me with the cute guy,'" Lambert says. "Distracting! He's the one guy that I found attractive in the whole group on the show: nice, nonchalant, pretty and totally my type -- except that he has a wife. I mean, he's open-minded and liberal, but he's definitely 100 percent straight." Danny Gokey is grinding his teeth right now, but it is out of jealousy.
· Then there is that cover, shot by Matthew Rolston (sorry, Adam: Rolling Stone used up its no-brainer David LaChapelle-shot cover on Lady GaGa). So many questions! Is he, uh, on the beach? Reclining on the day's laundry? Is that a kinda fake-looking snake [i.e. homosexuality] crawling up his leg? And does he apparently trim his chest? We won't know until Rolling Stone makes the whole article available. Hold my hand while we wait.
· The New Issue of Rolling Stone: The Liberation of Adam Lambert [Rolling Stone]
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Comments
My God. Does nothing please you blood-thirsty reporters? Yes, Adam is gay. Yes, Adam was inspired to join Idol through drugs. Yes, he's on the cover of Rolling Stone. You know what else Adam is? A human being. Start treating him like one - from criticizing his signature high-note to bashing on the "fake" snake (which, in reality, has a pulse), you just cannot seem to show the man any mercy.
He is one of the very few celebrities who is honest and respectable, yet you don't choose to bestow the same ass-kissing treatment as you do so willing upon those who don't deserve it.
Clap clap.
Wow, Mr. Buchanan, you really will go to any length to get people to read your pissy drivel. You take one statement out of context, and make it the basis for what you falsely claim as fact. Adam Lambert did not decide...(your implication) "Hey, I just got high...I think I will audition for American Idol." How did that statement become "The Obvious"? It's "obvious" you must be on drugs to promote trashy blogs. Are you related to Courtney Hazlett by any chance? Your mentality just made me vomit in my mouth, you needy bottom feeder.
Wait, let me grab some popcorn.
....
OK, I'm back. Continue.
Awww... people who have just discovered the internet are so cute!
Adam Lambert fans don't put up with any shit-talking.
Bad haircuts and incessant posing, yes; shit-talking, no.
The funniest part is that he's not really shit-talking at all. In fact, I have a feeling Adam himself would probably love his Movieline coverage.
That photograph sucks. No one looks good from that angle. What a waste of a fine specimen. They should have made the snake bigger and his crotch more prominent. There should be at least 2 rainbows, a unicorn, and more glitter. LOTS more glitter. And those lips need a little gloss. Too pale.
Come on, Kyle. He TOTALLY shaves his chest. JUST SAY NO, ADAM!!!
Yeah--the bit containing the video from the YH awards was pretty complimentary. The boy has fans, what can ya do.
Adam Lambert admits he's gay...the world says "Yeah, no duh." Gabe and Anon? You two can suck it. MovieLine + Snarky = FABULOUS! Kyle? I'll hold your hand honey, mamma's here for you...
Remember the days of Defamer, when commenting was a privilege? *sigh*.
Glammy looks like she could grow a delicious thicket of fur should she choose to put down the hedge clippers. This changes everything!
Who knew that all this time the pancake makeup wasn't really hiding bad skin, just a five o'clock shadow.
I'm so tired of would-be reporters thinking we give a crap about their opinion. State facts and get on with it. So he's gay! Maybe that turns you on a little, huh? Kyle? Is that the problem? Cuz the rest of us don't see one. He's one of the most extremely gifted singers alive. God gave him a great voice, and (unfairly) great looks, too. Let him do what he does best, which is entertain us. And you do what you do best...sit on the pot and take a good dump! Thanks for asking!
C'mon, it's fun. "So he's gay! Maybe that turns you on a little, huh? Kyle? Is that the problem?" Yes, that is the problem. Wait, what is the problem?
This comment is Rated PG-13 for hyperbole, falsehoods and some scatological humor.
Yes. And they should have added bananas, and sausages, and cucumbers, and a toy train going into a tunnel - no, that's too much. But, agreed, not enough in this photo.
Christ, is there some kind of Lambert Bat Signal? Where are all of these people coming from?
But you know what, Kyle, you guys could pay the bills alone with a daily Lambert post.
I expect an epic debate on the use of guyliner. It's almost as good as Nestor Carbonnell in The Dark Knight!
I can't believe how inflamed some of these comments are. Sheesh!
Lighten up, it's just a gossip blog after all.
Adam Lambert fans are just the Children of Claymates. I'm guessing they just google Adam's name all day long so that can locate anything relating to him, and then vehemently defend him against any type of blog criticism, for whatever purpose that might serve.
Anyhow, I think Adam was photographed laying on top of Ruben Studdard.
21st century bat signal = Google Alerts
Kinda frightening, no?
...there is nothing cooler than a confession of obvious sexuality nestled in between a tour update of Phish and a five-star David Fricke's review of Steely Dan’s new album.
Fixed.
Oh, trouser snakes...
"... you guys could pay the bills alone with a daily Lambert post."
... but please refrain.
Way to put your money where your vomit-filled mouth is, "ANONYMOUS!" You could have at least come up with a clever moniker.
Oh wait, no you couldn't.
Not for nothing, but I'd have to be on drugs to join American Idol, too.
Yeah, I remember, when it was just 5 douchebags with nothing to say, and if you wanted to join the club they asked you "How many sweaters do you own? "
Now at least there's more QUANTITY.
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