Adam Lambert Confirms the Obvious: Drugs Made Him Join Idol

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So this man, this Adam Lambert man, is on the cover of Rolling Stone now. Did we know this was going to happen? Hmmm, perhaps we had some sort of advance warning or something, but I only understand the language of Lambert when it's communicated in a hair-raising wail that's equal parts G'n'R emulation and phlegm. So what do we learn?

· "I don't think it should be a surprise for anyone to hear that I'm gay," he says, though we shouldn't expect him to become a civil rights leader. "Right after the finale, I almost started talking about it to the reporters, but I thought, 'I'm going to wait for Rolling Stone, that will be cooler,'" he says, which is true: there is nothing cooler than a confession of obvious sexuality nestled in between a tour update of Phish and a five-star Rob Sheffield review of Steely Dan's new album. "I didn't want the Clay Aiken thing and the celebrity-magazine bullshit. I need to be able to explain myself in context."

· Also, he joined American Idol after a psychedelic-fueled drug epiphany at Burning Man, which I think is how it happened for Tamyra Gray.

· He wanted to bang Kris Allen. Well, who didn't? "I was like, `Oh, (bleep), they [roomed] me with the cute guy,'" Lambert says. "Distracting! He's the one guy that I found attractive in the whole group on the show: nice, nonchalant, pretty and totally my type -- except that he has a wife. I mean, he's open-minded and liberal, but he's definitely 100 percent straight." Danny Gokey is grinding his teeth right now, but it is out of jealousy.

· Then there is that cover, shot by Matthew Rolston (sorry, Adam: Rolling Stone used up its no-brainer David LaChapelle-shot cover on Lady GaGa). So many questions! Is he, uh, on the beach? Reclining on the day's laundry? Is that a kinda fake-looking snake [i.e. homosexuality] crawling up his leg? And does he apparently trim his chest? We won't know until Rolling Stone makes the whole article available. Hold my hand while we wait.

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· The New Issue of Rolling Stone: The Liberation of Adam Lambert [Rolling Stone]



Comments

  • Gabrielle B. says:

    First of all, don't call me Gabe - sorry to break it to you, "mamma", but I'm not a boy. Second of all, I will not and simply cannot comply to your request; I tend to choke on small things.

  • LickyDisco says:

    Oh whew, you got me huh? Scorch! Guess that would have been funny if you would have aimed that comment at a guy. Keep trying though, you'll be writing jokes for Scholastic's "Captain Underpants" series in no time...

  • SunnydaZe says:

    All of the above makes me regret that I slept thru Tuesday.

  • SunnydaZe says:

    Yeah, I can’t wait till Movieline’s comment section is 7 pages of rants about eating disorders, ex-boyfriends, and John Cusack.

  • Heteroman says:

    Why is it that people feel the need to dig dirt on others to gossip about? People have no life-that is the problem!!! The guy can sing and he's gay and takes drugs so what?? 87% of the population has taken drugs at some stage in their life- 33% of the population has had at least one gay sexual experience in their life. The only thing that most of the population can't do, is sing like Adam does. So apart from his talent-what is the news here???

  • WTF says:

    Why are people offended by this blog? I found it funny. Adam would too - his own bro's writing style is hilariously snarky.

  • Kyle Buchanan says:

    You've all lost me.

  • headradio says:

    Adam's fans need to chill. One of his brother's less snarky wite-ups. From negativeneil.com
    "Honestly, though, I’m not hurting and “everybody hurts sometimes” is such a tautology that I’m shocked it became a hit song. It’s like singing “Sometimes we get sleepy” and parlaying that into a platinum single. Take note, Adam.
    We land and I proceed to baggage claim. I grab a Rolling Stone on the way because Adam’s on the cover, lips slightly apart doing his best “Which of your kids am I going to defile? Son or daughter?” face. I read the article while waiting for the baggage to arrive and my driver, sent by 20/20 is wandering around with a sign raised high that reads “LAMBERT”. Very subtle. Some hushed whispers elicit from the gaggle of girls behind me and I realize I’m very obviously telling everyone we’re related and put it away.
    The 20/20 interview was great. The woman who organized the whole thing is my kind of person. Salty and sarcastic with a mouth that isn’t shy towards strangers. We’re immediately comfortable with each other. The interview mostly focused on the recent revelation that Adam is gay. Huge surprise, America, I know. Then it’s over.
    I talk to my mom and we agree that we both suffer the same symptom in interviews: we ramble. She notes that Adam never rambles and I posit a guess. The dynamic towards him in interviews is different. Reporters want to know everything and he controls access to information as he sees fit. Therefore in interviews you see Adam give succinct, witty responses. My mom and I are just greedy famewhores desperate for every second in the limelight. So we sit there and ramble, desperate for every crumb of information with which to make a trail for the interviewer. It’s pathetic really, but that’s how it is. We aren’t pathetic people, we just like validation. Nothing wrong with that."

  • Gabrielle B. says:

    Oh, real wise - that's coming from some one who mistook Gabrielle for Gabe. How am I to believe your gender when you couldn't even guess that of an obvious female? Hey, now - you are the one who aimed the obnoxious (prominently male) comment at me, hun. And if you didn't want to hear an excerpt from my "Captain Underpants" manuscript, then you really shouldn't have provoked the jokester in me, mom.

  • glambert says:

    I am iranian glambert and I have 16 years old.I really love Adam and it is not important that he is gay beause I believe he can choose the way of his life so please don't speake about his personal life,and if you are real glambert just wish the best thing for him.
    with the best wishes for you Adam lambert (^-^) from your fan.

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