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Squint and You Can Almost Make Out Taylor Lautner's Werepenis

· Sorry to drop this on you guys so late in the day, but we have yet more exclusive footage from New Moon, including one transformation of Taylor Lautner into a werewolf -- sorry, we mean wolfy shape shifter -- in which you can make out some furry peen. You should see it on a full moon! (And yes he's only 17, but it's 17 wolf years.)

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Mercy Granted

While the other networks' programming saw down numbers, NBC posted a ratings gain (7.3 million in the 18-49 demo) for Mercy, marking a second ascending week for the new drama. Says THR's James Hibberd of the steady climb, "If the number holds up in the nationals, I expect NBC to give this show a full season pickup (you heard me)." I don't object. Taylor Schilling is a confident lead, and she's funny. As long as she doesn't keep crowing about her nursing techniques "from the front lines!" of Iraq, I can handle a full season. It's certainly better than all other trauma-based network fare. [THR]

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Liza Minnelli Crashes SATC 2, Has Mystery Star 'Sobbing Like a Baby'

We already knew Liza Minnelli would drop into Sex and the City 2 for a rendition of "Single Ladies." But according to one actor who shot the film's big wedding scene with her, it was one of her mother's songs that stopped the show. "After the shoot, she said, 'I would like to have everyone's attention,' and they pulled out a stool for her at the piano and gave her a mic and she sang a favorite of her mother, Judy Garland. She said, 'Thank you for letting me play with you guys,'" said Nicholas Rodriguez. "It was so heartfelt and genuine. I got choked up and several people were sobbing like a baby, but I'm not going to name names because he might be really embarrassed." That's your cue, Movieline readers! Start your sobby-blind-item-guessing-game engines in the comments. [People]

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Ashlee Simpson-Wentz and Colin Egglesfield Fired from Melrose Place

So much for establishing a devious, sexy whodunit! In an effort to alter the tone of their ratings-deficient revamp, Melrose Place producers have fired stars Ashlee Simpson-Wentz and Colin Egglesfield (who played highly suspicious murder suspects Violet and Augie) saying that their arcs on the show will conclude in December. The producers' full reasoning, plus a forecast for the show's rejiggered tone, after the jump.

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Roman Polanski's Lawyer on Surrender: Never Mind

I want to apologize in advance for Roman Polanski updates on consecutive days when relatively nothing has happened with the case. That said, the fissure in his defense team absolutely bears noting, if only for its leader's uncommonly strenuous refusal to capitulate to requests for his client's extradition. Not very French!
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Avatar, Take Two

If you're ready to break out that blue greasepaint you barely even used on Avatar Day, tomorrow will afford you the perfect opportunity, as the second trailer from Cameron's blue movie will be released only in theaters. Slashfilm's got a spy description of what to expect from the three-and-a-half-minute trailer (!), and it appears to imply we'll see Michelle Rodriguez in Na'vi form. Cerulean M-Rod? OK Cameron, you've piqued my curiosity. [Slashfilm]

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Tracy Morgan Openly Weeps On Public Radio, Also Big Fan of Anal Sex: AUDIO

Terry Gross's interview with Tracy Morgan on Fresh Air today is something of a must-listen (download it here) for anyone who counts themselves a fan of the R2D2-bepenised 30 Rock star. Gross starts the interview guardedly, scared even, of what clothes-shedding antics or uncensored non sequiturs would come tumbling out of Morgan's mind. Instead, Morgan comes in mildly miffed, grinding his axe over the recent media attention paid to swipes he made against former SNL co-stars Chris Kattan and Cheri Oteri in his new memoir I Am the New Black.
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Buzz Break: Francophilia

· James Franco has revealed more details about his upcoming General Hospital stint, namely that he considers it another installment of the very meta performance art portfolio he's developing with artist Carter. So, y'know, think about that when he's doing his fifth shirtless scene of the week.

· While appearing before Congress in her role as a U.N. goodwill ambassador, Nicole Kidman blamed Hollywood for contributing to violence against women, and also for The Stepford Wives.

· As predicted, the Funny People DVD and Blu-ray is going to have approximately a million billion hours of bonus footage, including a six-hour behind-the-scenes documentary on you, as you watch it.

· The rights have been picked up to Lynne Ramsay's upcoming Tilda Swinton drama We Need to Talk About Kevin.

· Stomp the Yard 2, everyone. The Yard can't take much more of this!

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Hulu to Charge as Soon as 2010, Warns Pringles Mascot

Step one: Infiltrate our atmosphere by disguising themselves as smug Fox animation moguls. Step two: Have the Visitors star in aggressive TV marketing campaigns touting their free, online content distribution system. Step three: Eat our brains. Step four: Charge us for the service. NOW WAIT JUST ONE SECOND. I was totally fine with the whole Hulu business model when all I had to do in exchange for watching missed episodes of The Office was sit through a few ads and have my brains sucked out of my ear by an alien.
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Dying Dollhouse

Despite encouraging DVR evidence that a sizable Dollhouse fan base exists, Fox is axing Joss Whedon's ratings-challenged series during November sweeps in favor of House repeats. Fox will honor its promise to air the complete second season of the sci-fi series by scheduling back-to-back Dollhouse episodes on Friday nights in December. Cast members are staying optimistic in the face of inevitable series death, as evidenced by Miracle Laurie's tweet late last night: "Trying not to be depressed. Get ANYONE you can convince to watch #Dollhouse LIVE this Fri, cuz we won't be back till Dec. see ya then! :(" [Entertainment Weekly]

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Charlize May Get Mad

E! is reporting that George Miller is near to settling on a cast for his long in-development resurrection of Mad Max, with Charlize Theron topping the wish list for his female lead. As for Max himself, Miller's eschewing Mel Gibson for fresh face Tom Hardy, who recently impressed in Bronson. Congrats, Tom: You're the new Sam Worthington! [E!]

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Judge Declares Mistrial in John Travolta Extortion Case

The pair accused of attempting to extort $25 million from John Travolta after his son's death earlier this year will be retried, a judge in the Bahamas said Wednesday. The decision came after a politician commented publicly that co-defendant (and former Bahamas Senate member) Pleasant Bridgewater was a "free woman," suggesting a leak from the jury room. A mistrial was declared soon after. Travolta's lawyer -- the one who doesn't speak in movie quotes -- said the actor will cooperate as needed and testify again if necessary. [AP]

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David Fincher to Make Unfailingly Perfect TV With House of Cards

· David Fincher and his Benjamin Button screenwriter Eric Roth will re-team to co-produce House of Cards, a television adaptation of the British book and acclaimed miniseries. The BAFTA- and Emmy Award-winning story of a politician maneuvering toward the prime minister spot will be moved to the U.S.; money folks Media Rights Capital will pitch it to networks "soon," though probably not soon enough to provide the best possible excuse for NBC to end Jay Leno's experiments at 10 p.m. Oh well. There will be others. [THR]

Rob Corddry scores a hat trick, a Letterman vet joins a rock star to take on Chuck Klosterman, and more Hollywood Ink after the jump.

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Halle and Marc, Stop Reading Now

· The NYT just put up its amaaaazing new profile of Precious director Lee Daniels, and while writer Lynn Hirschberg provides a couple weirdo passages (I particularly enjoyed her random reference to "a white actor named Wes Bentley"), this is the Lee Daniels show, and it's glorious. Go read it, but enjoy this little preview: "After producing two films, Daniels quickly became frustrated with not having complete control of his movies. 'I kind of co-directed Monster's Ball,' Daniels told me as he ordered another drink (the actual director was Marc Forster). 'I gave Halle her line readings. I knew how to do that: you tap into people's souls.'"
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Is Roman Polanski Contemplating Return to U.S.?

Having swung and missed in two attempts to nab bail, detained director Roman Polanski may have had enough of the Swiss justice system and is considering a return to face a judge on Los Angeles. Or so hinted one of the filmmaker's attorneys, who noted the possibility during a radio interview today in France.
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