Enjoy This Wonderfully Scathing Review of Battleship

rihanna-battleship-movie

Universal and Hasbro's $200 million-plus Battleship has emerged overseas, prompting one Germany-based critic to gas up his flamethrower and go to town: "This thing is an Asylum movie with hundreds of millions of dollars of gloss on it. And much like that hallowed studio, Battleship also feels free to snake ideas from other flicks. In fact, all of its ideas come from somewhere else. Its alien design steals from Halo and Power Rangers as well as a highly recognizable character from Green Lantern. The plot tricks come straight from ID4 (including a “Welcome to Earth”-style line for Rihanna (who, no kidding, is one of the few actually trying hard to deliver a real performance)). By the time they copy Transformers, Terminator and Predator, it’s sad. When they copy Titanic and Space Cowboys, it’s downright depressing." Can't wait! [Film School Rejects]



Comments

  • pete says:

    Hollywood is baby like

  • Yojimbo says:

    I am praying to every available deity that Peter Bradshaw reviews this next.

    Also, cannot wait for the Rihanna gifs. Shoot that gun, babygirl.

  • Brad Slager says:

    If I'm reading this accurately the implication here is that this movie, based on a board game, might be derivative.

  • KevyB says:

    Well, there's so much SHIT to choose from!

  • Sassy says:

    Is it really Water Transformers? Or Transformers of the Sea?

  • Tyrone says:

    Thanks again for the blog.Much thanks again. Keep writing.

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