'Philosophical' Bruce Vilanch Explains Why the Oscars Are Doomed

This is pretty much perfect: "since i am blamed whenever people don’t like it, but never praised when they do, and since most critics forget that they liked or hated something two years ago and cite it as a strength or weakness two years later, i’ve come to be philosophical about the show. if people don’t like the comic who hosts, they hate the show. if no comic hosts, they hate the show and demand that a comic be summoned. when he’s edgier, like chris rock, we get slammed. when he’s bland, like ellen, we get slammed. but a few things are clear. this is the oscars. they still mean something after 83 years, at least in the industry. unlike the mtv awards, their audience is not exclusively 9-18 year olds. unlike the golden globes, the voters are people who actually make movies, not pretend to be journalists. some things are simply inappropriate. it’s a dance every year to figure out what those are. every single line on the oscar show is negotiated. unless you’ve been there, you have no idea how it is put together. it’s like nothing else on earth. i’m writing a book about it, but i have to throw in my sexual escapades to make sure it sells." [Filmdrunk]

[Photo: Helga Esteb / Shutterstock.com]



Comments

  • MartiniShark says:

    Bruce needs to quit while he's ahead. I thought this sounded like a compelling read, and then I saw that last sentence. The inclusion of that man's sexcapades makes this a PASS -- talk about 180degrees out of phase!

    • j'accuse! says:

      Shudder the thought of the sexcapades. The very idea has already replaced the whale in my nightmares.

    • KevyB says:

      Lord, people, it's called a JOKE. And he's basically proving his point with all the comments where "his jokes aren't funny." Vilanch CAN be very funny. The people behind the Oscars just don't allow him to be. There are plenty of stories out there about hilarious jokes Vilanch wanted, but the people protecting the stars' fragile egos wouldn't allow them.

      • j'accuse! says:

        In on the joke KEVYB, but much like w/ the morbidly obese girl at the cafe when she "jokes" about her collection of vibrators, it's still a horrifying image.

        What I don't get is why this guy seems to have the Oscar writing gig till death. They ought to swap in a new writing team every year, get some fresh blood in there and change things up a bit. There's no reason why this one guy should have such a vice grip on writing this show.

      • MartiniShark says:

        Couple of things there Kevyb. Those two comments were also jokes, unless you really think people are getting worked up over Valanche talking about writing at the Oscars. Secondly, Bruce was not tied down here in this interview and he is not exactly turning people blue with his quips.

  • CooperM says:

    No, Bruce, it's that your writing is not good. People watch to see the actual awards, not to hear lame jokes and dated material. The former are interesting; the latter are painful.

  • blizzard bound says:

    I think the problem is his jokes land about as well as that last line.

    Also, "Oscar" and "edgy" in the same sentence? When?

  • blizzard bound says:

    OscarS, that is.

  • "every single line on the oscar show is negotiated"

    There's your problem right there.

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