'Again I Got Away': Arnold Schwarzenegger's Total Recall DVD Commentary is Priceless

Remember the scene in Total Recall where our foe's eyes pop out of his head at a climactic moment? Well, your ears will perform a similar feat when you hear Arnold Schwarzenegger's Total Recall DVD commentary with director Paul Verhoeven. It's as monotone, Austrian, and filled with hearty chuckles as you imagine. It is still funny. In fact, it is the best thing I've heard all month.

It meets my expectations, yet defies belief. I've checked a couple times to make sure it's not an amazing impersonation, but apparently both Verhoeven and Schwarzenegger really recorded a commentary. How can I possibly gift-wrap this and give it to my uncles for Christmas? Why isn't an electroclash remix available yet? Come on, internet.

Arnold Schwarzenegger on 'Total Recall' [Buzzfeed]



Comments

  • rainestorm says:

    There are few things more tedious than a DVD commentary that redundantly narrates the action onscreen. Sadly, it's not all that amusing, either.

  • Louis Virtel says:

    WHAT?

  • The WInchester says:

    What I can't believe is how long it took for the internet to become aware of this. This commentary, along with almost every other Schwarzenegger commentary track available (for a good time, watch Conan The Barbarian), has long been a source of amusement for me and my friends.

  • rainestorm says:

    There are few things more tedious than a DVD commentary that redundantly narrates the action onscreen. Sadly, it's not all that amusing, either.

  • j'accuse! says:

    There are few things more tedious than an intertubes commentary that redundantly (and wrongly) criticizes Ahhnold's amazing DVD commentary. Sadly, it's not all that amusing, either.

  • j'accuse! says:

    Why didn't you tell me? I could have brought the Löwenbräu!

  • rainestorm says:

    I'm always amused by people who, failing to provide any critique for the topic at hand (perhaps because they are uncertain in their opinions) resort instead to adolescent attacks on those who HAVE provided said critique.

  • The WInchester says:

    Lowenbrau?!?!? F*CK THAT SH!T!!
    PABST BLUE RIBBON!!!

  • j'accuse! says:

    First Chinatown, now Blue Velvet...dude...you rock my face off!

  • j'accuse! says:

    You're clearly very intelligent, with an excellent sense of humor. I bet you're great at parties!

  • The WInchester says:

    Cheers, mate!
    Thank you for giving me the set ups! You equally rock the proverbial socks.

  • rainestorm says:

    I simply disagreed with the author's assessment. If you have a differing opinion about the DVD commentary, I invite you to share it.

  • The Pope says:

    Ahnuld vood make a great public official. He'd be saying, "Ah, now here. Look, see? In this scene v haf no more mahnee. V are really screwed. Hahahaha."

  • SunnydaZe says:

    I just had my first Pabst two days ago. Something I have waited a lifetime for because of that very scene! STAY OUT OF MY HEAD, WINCHESTER!

  • SunnydaZe says:

    I am addicted. I want Mr. Schwarzenegger to do "Captain Obvious" commentary on every movie ever made or that will ever be made>
    "This is when he tells her he doesn't give a damn."
    "I love this scene! Rosebud is his sled! That's so great!"
    "This is where he dodges the bullet because he is the one! Look at that!"
    "He is looking in the mirror and says, "You talkin' to me?" which is great because he is talking to his own reflection!"

  • Elias says:

    Wow, I can’t believe this isn’t a parody…I’m just in awe that not only was this recorded, but someone actually allowed it to go out on the DVD…it reminds me of the Simpsons episode where the director commentary for The Postman was just Kevin Costner saying “I’m sorry,” over and over.

  • It reminds me of George P. Cosmatos doing the commentary for Tombstone. He literally just narrates all of the onscreen action. It's quite dull.

  • j'accuse! says:

    Sigh...just having a bit of fun man. Remember that, fun?

  • I do. However, I choose not to have my fun by being an ass to others.

  • The Cantankerist says:

    Yes, +1, the Winchester. I stayed in a flat in London in 2002 with a couple of cinema buffs, and their greatest guilty pleasure was to line up one of the Schwarzenegger commentaries and let 'er rip. Who else hunts for their stogie mid-commentary? It's fascinating and funny, and then you remember he was the governor of California and you go all quiet for a bit.

  • j'accuse! says:

    All evidence to the contrary. ;)

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