Grow Up, Star Wars Fans, and 7 Other Stories You'll Be Talking About Today

new_star_wars_500.jpgHappy Friday! Also in this edition of The Broadsheet: Lindsay Lohan will probably regret her new tattoo ... Scarlett Johansson has a new man in politics ... Contagion is sexier than first thought ... Old pals Werner Herzog and Errol Morris make the news together again ... and more...

· Setting aside the crucial matters of George Lucas's greed and ego, EW's Darren Franich has nevertheless offered a desperately needed wake-up call to a nation of emotionally stunted Star Wars fanboys: "Unfortunately, we live in an era of nostalgia, and nostalgia makes everything look profound, especially the stupid things you enjoyed when you were a kid. Take Return of the Jedi. Jedi is a bad movie by every measure, but I loved it when I was a kid, because when I was a kid I was much stupider than I am now, because kids are stupid. [...] The reason why we hate George Lucas is because we are George Lucas: Eternally obsessed with putting a spit-shine on films from long ago, insisting that Star Wars is the modern myth, and so it can never stop evolving." You know who you are. [EW]

· "Clear as a crystal sharp as a knife / I feel like I'm in the prime of my life." Those aren't just terrible Billy Joel lyrics any more -- it's the couplet freshly tattooed on Lindsay Lohan's right upper ribcage. Huh. I would have thought perhaps, "It might just be a lunatic you're looking for." [TMZ]

· Scarlett Johansson is campaigning for Manhattan borough president Scott Stringer to become New York City's next mayor: "Scott's passion for New York is contagious. We share a love for this city's diversity and culture. As a native New Yorker with a political history dedicated to community development, Scott's priorities echo my own." To wit: Stringer also employs Johansson's brother Hunter. [NYP]

· Just how sexy is the eponymous plague in the upcoming Contagion? The sneeze-fetishist community has the answer. [Gawker]

· Sundance Selects has acquired North American rights to Werner Herzog's new Death Row documentary Into the Abyss, which screens for the first this weekend in Telluride. [Deadline]

· Not to be outdone, Herzog's longtime filmmaking peer and philosophical sparring partner Errol Morris has officially released his new book about photography, Believing is Seeing -- "an excursion into the labyrinth of the past and into the fabric of reality." [Brain Pickings]

· Fun fact: A total of eight produced Black List alums will be premiering at this year's Toronto International Film Festival. [LAT]

· The producers of Napoleon Dynamite have filed suit against Fox Searchlight, claiming the distributor -- which catapulted the micro-budget cult darling to a $46 million gross -- owes them more than $10 million in home-video royalties. Not very freaking sweet. [Variety]


  • SD says:

    Some people may agree with Franich that Jedi is a bad movie but will blinking Ewoks make it better? No.
    I agree that there are movies that I enjoyed as a kid that, as a result, I still love today. Flash Gordon is a perfect example. Were I to see that today for the first time I would most likely find it awful.
    But the only reason I would buy a copy is because I would want to see the movie that I fell in love with. Flash Gordon with better special effects would not make it a better movie in the same way that blinking Ewoks and ridiculous added Darth Vader dialogue will not improve Jedi.
    I wonder what Richard Marquand would think of this tinkering of his film were he alive today...

  • J K says:

    Kids aren't stupid. George Lucas's internal idea of kids is stupid. And insulting.
    And it's beside the point. I have always thought Star Wars was shit,
    and the new age-y "modern myth" acolytes silly identity-seekers.
    It's an important issue because of the philosophical implications laid out
    by 1988 George.
    When Ted started painting Casablanca, should we have
    dismissed the outraged as silly nostalgists who were making too much out
    of an obviously disposable commercial product?
    "Lighten up, it's just a movie." Sigh.
    Just let a work be finished. Let the worker of art move on.
    You'd think, to look at George, he'd know how to put a fork in it...
    That's a fat joke, you see.
    Sneeze-fetishist community? Mr. Vanairsdale. Are you trying to tell us something?

  • RE "sneeze-fetishist community": Don't shoot the messenger! Explanation at the link. I'm more a earache man, myself.

  • J K says:

    All that puffy dizziness, those sticky drops and that sexy-ass cotton wad. Oh, yeah. Hurts so good...
    A ragweed and thistle bouquet has been dispatched, nonetheless.