The Great Scream Liveblog Epilogue: Scream 4

Let me tell you, as perhaps the only person who (at least until this Friday) has seen all four Scream movies in one day, it creates a very unique perspective on the universe. Could I kill a fellow human? It sure seems a lot more plausible! Regardless, even though a proper live blog of Scream 4 wasn't possible, I kept a spoiler-free -- except one, I'm not the killer, Louis -- running diary of my experience viewing Scream 4.

5:35 p.m. It's raining and the last thing in the world that I want to do right now is leave to watch a fourth Scream movie. If someone gave me the option of watching Scream 4 or Sucker Punch again... OK, it would definitely be Scream 4. Sometimes a situation just has to be put in perspective to fully appreciate how bad it could be.

5:43 p.m. A man just darted out into traffic across 2nd Ave. Honestly, I'm fairly sure that a car could have hit him and I would not have flinched.

6:08 p.m. A weird thing just happened on the train: It's a fairly empty car, but, about 45 seconds before we arrived at Grand Central, a fairly well-built man walks towards me and proceeds to stand facing me, about one foot from my face. And I'm standing on the opposite side to where the car doors will open. Is he going to stab me? It wouldn't surprise me. It wouldn't surprise me if everyone on this train started to stab me.

6:25 p.m. I arrive at the theater in Times Square and enter a moderately sized line next to a few people that I know. But there's something different about them: They all look a little more, I don't know... bloodthirsty.

6:30 p.m. An announcement is made by security, "Folks, this is not a single file line. Everyone needs to bunch up near the front." What? Look, I've been standing in lines my entire life. This goes against every line managing procedure that I've ever witnessed. I have convinced myself that they want everyone bunched together so it will be easier to stab us all.

7:05 p.m. For the fourth time today, I see the Scream title card flash in front of me. The audience seems pleased.

7:08 p.m. It's become apparent that Wes Craven is not a fan of the Saw movies.

7:15 p.m. Courteney Cox is on screen. Mercifully, she has fixed her hair from the way it looked in Scream 3.

7:24 p.m. A disparaging remark is made in the film about a publicist; the audience made up primarily of entertainment journalists cheer -- by far the biggest reaction up to this point.

7:36 p.m. One of the best things about Scream 4 is just that's it's a Scream movie that's not dated. No lines like, "Hey, give me your pager number and I'll page you if I'm in trouble. Remember, look for my page. Then, after you get my page, call me from the nearest pay phone and I'll tell you where the killer is. Then we will listen to the new song by Collective Soul."

7:58 p.m. There's an underground party in the film called "Stabathon," where people gather to watch every Stab film back-to-back. Or, as it's called in reality, Mike Ryan's Tuesday.

8:34 p.m. The very noticeable bedroom poster of Creed in Scream 3 has been replaced by Emma Robert's very noticeable bedroom poster of U2's The Joshua Tree. I get that this time they most likely wanted to use something that's a bit more iconic, but I defy anyone to find one current high-school aged girl who has a poster up from an album that came out in 1987.

9:00 p.m. After watching these four movies, I can't help but think things like: Do they not have DNA testing in the Scream universe? Wouldn't there be hair fibers left inside the mask?

9:35 p.m. After witnessing over 30 people stabbed to death today, I am completely desensitized to murder right now. I find myself saying things, "You know, I bet I could get away with a murder" to my girlfriend. She is not amused.

10:00 p.m. I've never really watched The Good Wife before, but there's a soothing nature about it that brings me back to a stable reality and puts me to sleep (even though for the first 20 minutes I expected Ghostface to show up at any moment and stab Christine Baranski). Regardless, thank you, Julianna Margulies, for helping me sleep well last night.

Drop back by Movieline on Thursday for our official review of Scream 4 and this weekend's box-office forecast.

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