Michael Costello Talks to Movieline About What the Cameras Didn't Show on Project Runway Last Night

Michael Costello was a lightning rod for controversy during this season of Project Runway. Ivy accused him of cheating, Gretchen accused him of being "either an idiot savant or an idiot," and the judges' continuous praise of his work baffled some of his fellow designers. During last night's episode he revealed two unfortunate personal truths: His parents haven't been very supportive of his ambitions, and his own boyfriend outed him to his family. To top off that headiness, we watched as the 27-year-old Palm Springs designer bawled on the runway after Heidi announced his elimination at episode's end. This morning Movieline caught up with Costello to discuss the "panic attack" he says we didn't see on TV, his relationships with Ivy and April now, and choice for the winner of season eight.

Walk us through your strong reaction to being eliminated. It appeared as if you couldn't look the judges in the face.

I didn't want to. I didn't want to look at the judges because I really feel like they screwed up. I really did. I was so hurt and blown away because I put so much effort and so much time and work into that collection. Like, literally, as soon as I got off the airplane after they sent us home to make the collection, I went and bought a sewing machine and feathers. I pushed myself to different limits, like dyeing feathers and hand-drying them and not sleeping for three days in a row just to finish one dress. I was just so disappointed. I'm not disappointed anymore though. Throughout the entire season I did ask God to take me as far as he could take me. The reason I was so disappointed -- and everyone asked me why I blew up or why I lost it or lost my cool if I was just the humble guy who said, "I want to go as far as I could go." The thing was, the day before all of that happened, I was talking to my mom and begging her to come to Fashion Week, and she didn't want to go because my boyfriend was going to go. I was just dead inside because I know she'll never get to see the collection. That was just so hard for me. That's why I lost it. I kept on saying, "What am I going to tell my mom and dad?" [Breaks.] Oh, I'm sorry. It's a long story.

When you looked at Mondo, Andy, and Gretchen's three-piece collections, did you think you had a strong chance of making the final three?

I have to tell the truth, I thought my collection was pretty strong and good. The judges still said positive things about it, and they said the workmanship was there, the craft was there, the talent was there. That's great and all. But they said my confidence level didn't come across too strongly, and maybe it didn't. But I was pretty confident. When you're up there, you're just terrified because you get tongue-tied and you don't know what to say or what to do. There was something that wasn't shown; I had a panic attack, like three or four minutes before it was my time to talk about my collection. I overheated and I had a severe panic attack, and one of the producers called me down. I wasn't feeling good because I was not eating [due to] how nervous I was. If you look at the show, you'll see I'm 18 pounds lighter than I normally was. I was just very stressed out, and it was very difficult. The [judges] had some valid points too. I was really blown away by Mondo's collection. At first when I saw it, I wasn't impressed it, but when I saw everything come together, it was really beautiful. Andy's too was really outstanding -- the colors were great and really beautiful. I was not that impressed with Gretchen's collection, but I did see the whole look when it came together at Fashion Week, and I thought it was really beautiful. She really took it there. She really gave you a beautiful element of fashion. I can't tell you who wins, but I think they all did a beautiful job. My win is for Mondo.

Ivy Higa told us that you two are friends now, even after she waged a war against you and accused you of cheating. Is that true?

I like her. I have nothing but nice things to say about Miss Ivy Higa. I like her a lot. She and I ran into each other in the streets of New York. We got some coffee, we got to talking. She was woman enough to come up to me and apologize about everything. She said, "Look, I want to apologize if I came off a little too hard. It's a competition, and we're all fighting for the same thing. We're all trying to win this prize" and everything. And she said, "At first, in the beginning, you came off a little hard too." So, we fixed it. After that, we were talking about our collections, talking about dresses, talking about fashion. So she's cool in my book, I like her a lot.

I read that you cried when you read that April criticized you last week. Were you shocked by what she had to say?

I really don't like April at all. Really, not at all. Even up until this day. I did see her at Fashion Week, and I just didn't know that we were not cool with each other. I sent her a letter on Facebook and said, "Hey, I watched the latest episode, and I'm just shocked that you were saying things about me." Everybody's trying to say that I'm the victim. I never felt like the victim. I just really didn't know who was talking about me. I didn't know. People may think it's a lie, but I really didn't know. The thing is, I just didn't know why she didn't like me so much when I would always pay her so many compliments throughout the entire season. I really wanted to see her go to Fashion Week because I was curious to see a really cool collection from her. But I was just blown away by the comments she would make.

So I Facebooked her and I said, "Hey, was there something by any chance that I might have done to you that caused you to have these feelings toward me? I pay you nothing but nice comments." She said, "No, you're cool in my book. But back then it was different. But I'm good with you now." And I said, "Oh, OK." But on October the 15th, I read an interview where she's mocking me. If you really liked me, you had chances to set the record straight. Some people just need to let it go. I let it go. I went as far as I can go and I told the other designers there in the final three, "You know how happy I am for you." I told them the truth. So, you just need to let it go and make it as far as you can go. So what if my dresses are ruched and held together with a cord? The judges loved them and millions and millions of other viewers love them too.