Scoring the Real Housewives of New Jersey Throwdown: Ripped Weaves, Broken Heels and All
· The otherwise useless bodyguard, tired of dragging Danielle, lifts her into his arms and carries her to the car. (Otherwise Useless Bodyguard: +1)
· Danielle, safely in Kim G.'s car, hysterically demands that the driver not take her home. This makes sense to no one. (Danielle: -1)
· Danielle's only ally, Kim G., leaves Danielle crying in the car to talk rationally about what just went down with Teresa and Ashley. (Kim G.: +1)
· Jacqueline waits by Danielle's car, staring through the tinted windows in a psych-out attempt. (Jacqueline: +1)
· Danielle tells the police that she "just wants to go go home" -- and is completely capable of just going home -- but for some reason, stays. (Danielle: -2)
· Danielle takes the time to tearfully prove to police that she is not wearing a weave, "This is real hair! At the end of my head!" and tearfully demands that Ashley is arrested. (Danielle: -2)
· Teresa calmly denies having a driver's license and tells police that Danielle is a "coke whore." (Teresa: +1)
· In spite of Danielle's emphatic wails, no one is arrested at the Brownstone. (Danielle: -3)
FINAL TALLY: Last night's winner is Ashley for pulling out Danielle's weave on television, earning her a lifetime of internet notoriety, without even being arrested. Teresa finished second with 6, Jacqueline finished third with 3 and Kim G. closed in with 2. Finally, Danielle's free-willed heel and the Otherwise Useless Bodyguard limped across the finish line with 1 point each while Danielle, a huddled mass of tears, finished last with -7. Better luck next time, Danielle. And remember readers, always aim for the weave.
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Comments
You are a sick chick! Actually saying that Ashley is the "winner"-if I would have seen her do that to another person I would have kicked her spoiled, attention seeking, reality seeking, gonna cry anytime someone says that I can't do something ASS!!!!
Assault is not something that should be taking lightly. I don't like Danielle, but the way she was ganged up on at that event was alarming and it definitely crossed the line of acceptable behavior.
It turned out that Danielle did have a good reason for hiring bodyguards after all.
Real housewives, real psychological issues? Read, join the discussion and decide for yourself!
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OMG , IF DANIELLE DIDN'T WANT THE DRAMA.. THEN WHY IS SHE KEEPING IT UP???????
Danielle set this up, When she was getting dressed she commented on her heels saying she wasn't going to be running from anyone??
All Theresa did was say hello. Danielle took it too the level it went too by yelling that Theresa House was in foreclosure and then Danielle ran before Theresa ran after her??? If Danielle didn't want a fight she should of said hello to Theresa and walked away. Danielle WANTED A CONFRONTATION.
What the world really needs is more love and less paperwork. — Pearl Bailey
No one needs a vacation so much as the person who has just had one.--Elbert Hubbard (1856--1915), U.S. publisher
Danielle is disgusting she is a disgrace to her family and they ALL know it!Poor kids they really need to be removed from her home which by the way looks like a house for a gremlin.
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