The Machete Trailer: Cinco De Die-O

Talk about prescient: Robert Rodriguez's Machete was filmed over a year ago, but its plot is decidedly ripped from the headlines. In Arizona, a nasty senator is rounding up all the illegal immigrants and sending them back across the border. Only in this scenario, there's a bad-ass former Federale killing people at will to stop the injustice and clear his name. Bring your ID, because this could get ugly...

Of course Machete is based on the fake trailer Rodriguez made for Grindhouse back in 2007. And there are many scenes in this new "illegal" trailer lifted straight from the original: Machete gets double-crossed, goes on a rampage, much Karo-soaked carnage ensues.

Still, lest you think Rodriguez just cobbled together some old NSFW clips to get this out there in time for Cinco De Mayo, there's Robert De Niro chewing scenery as the nefarious senator, Jessica Alba as what appears to be a double-agent, Michelle Rodriguez with an eye-patch and Lindsay Lohan (yep!) fellating a pistol (of course!). There's also original Machete players like Jeff Fahey (Frank Lapidus for life) and Cheech Marin.

But the trailer really belongs to Danny Trejo as Machete. I'd say "get this man a franchise!" but he probably just got one here. Between this and Piranha 3D, late summer just got a whole lot more campy. And awesome.

VERDICT: Sold.

· Hey Arizona, Don't F*ck With This Mexican... Machete Has Some Cinco De Mayo Words For You!!! [Ain't It Cool]