How to Make Law & Order: Los Angeles Relevant: A TVLine IM Discussion

Julie: Someone else is trying to start up a talent management business. He's taking calls from producers at the crime scene.

Louis: Total wiseguy. Veronica Mars's Jason Dohring. Pretty, pretty please.

Julie: One of the lead detectives also has to have a really complex past involving the industry. Like, he was an on-the-cusp stuntman until he accidentally killed the alligator playing Elvis on Miami Vice.

Louis: That sentence makes me feel like falling in love.

Julie: Now, any time he sees alligator purses/shoes/briefcases, he blacks out and sometimes tumbles into a violent rage. This happened once during a witness questioning.

Louis: Is "Julie Miller" code for "Dick Wolf Deluxe"? Please check yes or yes.

Julie: The witness had heard about the incident, casually mentioned large reptiles or Lubriderm commercials or something, and Barnie flew off the handle. I don't know. (If anyone from Law & Order is reading this, yes I am available to intern.)

Louis: Episode 1.06: "Scales of Justice."

Julie: There have to be flashbacks, too. Barnie's "episodes" become so dangerous to those around him that his partner tries to arrange a meeting with Miami Vice star Don Johnson to finally put the incident behind him.

Louis: Chilling! Barnie is a man unhinged. Master P wants him off the job while Danica knows that behind the traumatized eyes is a potential Human Target star with a dream deferred.

Julie: I could talk about this all day.

Louis: Have we established that Barnie is played by, you know, Erik Estrada or someone similar?

Julie: I like that.

Louis: Throw in a few cynical wide shots of the Santa Monica pier, and we have a syndicated-on-arrival drama on our hands. To another 17 years!

Julie: Salut!

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