Project Runway Recap: Too Legit, Must Quit

The Runway

Heidi introduces Lucy Ricardo-McGillicuddy-Kors and Ricky Ricardo-Garcia before unveiling a surprise -- a guest-judge in the form of legendary person Jessica Alba. The designers clap in awe, because they just loved Honey.

The show begins now!

Mila produces a puckery black dress with metallic trimmings. It's skimpy and color-blocked and a registered trademark of Mila-Vision. Fourth-place at best.

Jonathan was forced to scrap two previous attempts at a passable outfit. His last try is an overbearingly beige, outrageously short number with slight touches of red and black draping. From the back, there's an organic swoop that flatters his model (the problem-magnetic Brandice). From the front, nothing fits together. It looks like mismatched sheets of sandpaper.

Emilio utilizes an attractive fabric in a glittery root beer hue. The real star of this basic column dress is the fit, which hugs the model in the most glamorously Edith Head way possible.

Jay fashions a cumulonimbus-colored corset with a fluffy ass. That about does it. See you in the bottom two, Jean-Shorted One.

Seth Aaron comes up with a black, ribbed dress with vertical rods lining the bodice. Heidi doesn't do rods, Seth Aaron. People will stare, and all the gossip columns will vomit up headlines like "You Rod-da Be KIDDING Us!" and "Who Let the RODS Out?" and "Rod You Glad You Didn't Say Banana?" and other Algonquin Round Table classics. Shameful.

Anthony gives us a flowing black-and-white number that appears dated to my eyes. Heidi and Jessica both love it, and Jessica threatens to borrow it from Heidi. Heidi threatens to bring up Jessica's career, and Jessica will just shut up for a second now.

Rational decisions be damned: Two winners are declared! Emilio and Anthony rack up victories, and Jessica Alba says she'll wear Anthony's dress at an upcoming grocery store visit, or something. The bottom two are Jonathan and Jay, and because damning Jonathan's work is in vogue at the moment, he is eliminated. There you have it -- a devastating day of Runway eliminations, resignations, comebacks, and downfalls. We'll have our interviews with Jonathan and Maya up by day's end. In the meantime, what did you think of this episode? Was Maya right to leave? Was Jonathan unjustly auf'd? Was Heidi a gorgon in gorgeous clothing? You've rod-da let us know.

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