Presenting the 2010 Movieline Sundancies Awards!

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Tomorrow night, Sundance will host the official Closing Night Awards Ceremony -- but if utterly subjective hardware-distribution is what you seek, your wait is over! The First Annual Movieline Sundancies Awards are about to get underway, its twenty gleaming trophies -- each painstakingly hand-cast in the shape of a pair of golden Ugg boots -- lined up and ready to be presented to this year's list of illustrious winners. Click on for the results!

Best Use of Locations (above-ground division): Lovers of Hate

Bryan Poyser's terrific microbudget love-triangle thriller sets up an entire cat-and-mouse chase inside a sprawling mountain manse. The best part: It's located in Park City! Ingenious and meta! -stv

Best Use of Locations (below-ground division): Buried

Somehow, director Rodrigo Cortes and star Ryan Reynolds manage to maintain 90 lively minutes inside a coffin hidden somewhere in the Iraq desert. As technical achievements go, it's nothing short of astonishing. -stv

Worst Use of Close-Up: Enter the Void

Gaspar Noe's sprawling psychedelic head-trip is a technical masterpiece, with each scene literally traveling to the next by floating over Tokyo rooftops or swooping through lightbulbs, sink drains and bodily cavities. Fine -- but the slow, spiraling descent into a kidney-shaped tray holding a freshly aborted fetus proved to be a little....how do you say?...much. -sa

Best Use of Close-Up: Hesher

Young Devin Brochu's face frequently filled the entire screen, and never conveyed anything but 100% honesty. Kid's going places. -sa

Best Monologue: Rich Tillman, The Tillman Story

After rote eulogizing by military figures and celebrities at Pat Tillman's funeral, the dead soldier's younger brother Rich takes the podium with a beer in hand and unleashes a barnburner: "I didn't write shit because I'm not a writer. I'm not just going to sit here and break down on you. But thanks for coming. Pat's a fucking champion and always will be. Just make no mistake, he'd want me to say this: He's not with God. He's fucking dead. He's not religious. So, thanks for your thoughts, but he's fucking dead." -kb

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Most Counterintuitive Character Name: Smurf, Animal Kingdom

The cutthroat matriarch of the film's disintegrating Australian crime family is neither blue nor three apples high nor sequestered in a mushroom. That said, her ruthlessness could easily give Gargamel a run for his money. -stv

Most Unappetizing Meal: Winter's Bone

Determined to drive some self-sufficiency into her younger siblings, Jennifer Lawrence's Ree teaches them how to gut a squishy dead squirrel for food. Delish! -kb

Most Grating Voice-Over: Kieran O'Brien, The Shock Doctrine

The Shock Doctrine, the lesser controversial of Michael Winterbottom's two Sundance offerings this year, used the narration skills of actor Kieran O'Brien, whose loud, nasal, WWII-BBC-newsreel-announcer delivery was the equivalent of a jackhammer on a* hungover skull. (*Translation: "my.") -sa

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Biggest Comeback: Malin Akerman, happythankyoumoreplease

After being miscast in Watchmen and wasted in Couples Retreat, Akerman actually shines in happythankyoumoreplease as an alopecia-afflicted party girl. Who knew? -kb

Most Pervasive Narrator: Kiefer Sutherland, Twelve

Very little of interest happens in Joel Schumacher's Sundance bomb, but rest assured, Kiefer will narrate every single thing as though he were recording a special headphones track for the blind. -kb

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Comments

  • Guy Montag says:

    Three years ago, just before the 2006 mid-term elections, Kevin Tillman published his eloquent letter “After Pat’s Birthday". Kevin hoped a Democratic Congress would bring accountability to our country. But, just as with warrantless wiretapping and torture, those responsible for the cover-up of his brother’s friendly-fire death have never been held accountable for their actions.
    Both the film “The Tillman Story” and Jon Krakauer‘s book, “Where Men Win Glory,” blamed the Bush administration and the Army for the whitewash of Pat Tillman's death. However, the cover-up was actually a thoroughly bi-partisan affair. In particular, the Democratic Congress and the Obama Presidency have protected General Stanley McChrystal from scrutiny and punishment for his central role in the handling of the aftermath of Pat Tillman's friendly-fire death.
    I’ve posted the following documents on http://www.feralfirefighter.blogspot.com that detail how General McChrystal has been protected by Congressman Henry Waxman, Senator James Webb (along with Senators Carl Levin and John McCain), the New York Times Pentagon Reporter Thom Shanker, and the Center for a New American Security's (CNAS) Andrew Exum:
    “WHERE MEN WIN GLORY” -- Andrew Exum, the Center for a New American Security (CNAS), and the Whitewash of General McChrystal’s Role in the Cover-Up of Pat Tillman’s Fratricide
    “LIES … BORNE OUT BY FACTS, IF NOT THE TRUTH” -- Senator James Webb, Thom Shanker & The New York Times and the Whitewash of General McChrystal’s Role in the Aftermath of Pat Tillman’s Death
    “DID THEY TEACH YOU HOW TO LIE YET? -- Senator James Webb, General Stanley McChrystal, and the Betrayal of Pat Tillman
    "A SENSE OF HONOR -- Pat Tillman & Senator James Webb
    "REMEMBER THE ICONOCLAST, NOT THE ICON -- Pat Tillman 1976 -- 2004"
    "BATTLE FOR THE TRUTH -- Iddo Netanyahu, Kevin Tillman and the Cover-Up of Their Brother's Death"
    It’s not surprising that after the initial fratricide cover-up fell apart, Army officers and the Bush administration lied to protect their careers. Reprehensible, but understandable. But the Democratic Congress, after they took control of both Houses in 2006, could have gone after those responsible. Or at least not promoted them!
    Five years ago, Pat Tillman’s family were handed a tarnished Silver Star. It was a travesty of justice that General McChrystal was promoted to the Army’s highest rank, and handed his fourth star.

  • Katherine says:

    funny, that's exactly what I was thinking about yesterday

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