5 Brilliant Moments From Day 2 of James Franco's General Hospital Odyssey
On today's episode of General Hospital, Franco was upgraded from dumpster-lurking bum to internationally revered crazy person during his art show. The mysterious performance artist, visiting Port Charles to hawk his gory corpse photos and murder-inspired installation pieces, alternatively charmed, entertained and creeped out admirers of his work through cheap pick-up lines, graffiti tic tac toe and scary blindfold games. After the jump, the five most remarkable moments.
1. Franco Seduces Maxie While Convincing Her That He is Not a Vagrant
Maxie (Kirsten Storms), a Crimson employee ordered to get an exclusive with the reclusive genius, is startled to walk into the Franco Showroom to see a man sleeping inside one of the displays. Unaware that this slumping mass is the artiste, Maxie asks him to vacate the premises while a bemused Franco surveys his own work and declares, "Cool, performance art."
For a solid five minutes, Maxie fails to understand that the mysterious man in black is actually Franco, in spite of these lines:
Maxie: What is Franco going to say?
Franco: He likes it.
Maxie: My editor basically wants me to throw my skirt over my head to get an exclusive with him.
Franco: I like the visual.
2. While Looking for Proper Identification to Prove That He Is Indeed Franco, Franco Inexplicably Produces Passports Belonging To Keith Richards and Hunter S. Thompson
Still unconvinced that Franco is Franco, Maxie asks for some standard identification documents like a driver's license or library card.
Franco reaches deep into his pocket and pulls out two passports -- belonging to Keith Richards and Hunter S. Thompson. There is no further explanation as to why this happened, Franco never produces a legitimate form of identification and the pair continues with the banter.
Maxie: Are you pretending to be someone famous just to get me into bed?
Franco: What would get you into bed?
3. Franco Challenges Luke To a Dramatic Graffiti-Off
In his final attempt to prove that he is Franco, the mysterious artist whose "canvas is murder" spray paints a peace sign onto his showroom wall. Maxie momentarily melts down at the prospect of getting into trouble for this gallery damage, but is interrupted by Luke Spencer (Anthony Geary), a middle-aged character with elaborately coiffed spiky blond hair and earrings, General Hospital's answer to Rod Stewart.
Luke: You call that art?
Franco: You think you can do better?
Luke grabs the spray paint bottle and draws a tic tac toe board next to Franco's peace sign.
Luke: Your move, Rembrandt.
Franco: You want to know the difference? I can walk out [into that showroom] and get 50 grand easy for that peace sign.
Luke: You take these folks to the cleaners, Warhol...You're dripping in fake blood and peddling cheap thrills. If you came across them first hand, you'd wet your pants."
4. Franco Asks For an Introduction to Jason, Provides Meta-Commentary On His Performance Art
Spotting Jason from across the gallery, Franco demands that Maxie introduce him.
Maxie: I don't know that that would be such a good idea. See, Jason isn't what you'd call "user friendly" and he doesn't know anything about art.
Franco: The best art is understood by the fewest number of people.
Maxie: Oh, well you're incredibly popular, does that mean you're not any good?
Franco: I'm good, but he may be better.
Maxie: He's not an artist.
Franco: Look again.
5. Despite Date Rape Circumstances, Franco Charms Maxie
Having just met Franco, Maxie agrees to go back to the artist's apartment blindfolded. Once inside, Franco positions her on the ground, outlines her body in chalk, lays a club next to her, and then clicks away on his camera. Maxie, trembling, yells "What are you doing!?" As soon as Franco removes the blindfold though, the mood shifts from date-rape to first date.
Maxie: You know, this place is kind of amazing when you can actually see it.
Franco: Some men take women to trendy restaurants and chic bars, I take women to a studio that looks like the artist's head exploded and his ideas splattered all over the walls...Clearly my social skills could use some work.