Near-Death Cab For Cutie

pattinson-cab.jpg

People is reporting that dreamy-haired Remember Me star Robert Pattinson was sideswiped by a speeding taxi in lower Manhattan today as he fled a rampaging crowd of unruly Twi-hards. "Pattinson, 23, did not appear to be injured and was able to walk away from the incident," they report. The shaken taxi driver, meanwhile, was last seen detailing his version of events to two NYPD officers, apparently a formidable Twilight fan in his own right as he explained, "I very nearly killed my beautiful, beautiful Edward! If only I could have leaped to his safety, and held the infernal vehicle at bay with one outstretched, super-vampire-strengthed arm. Do you think I could meet Taylor Lautner, or is that not in the cards?" [People]



Comments

  • Inhaler says:

    Not longer after the accident took place, the taxi driver was ripped limb from limb by angry onlookers. Robert took his pinkie finger as a souvenir. "Another one for the necklace," he was heard to have said.

Post a Comment

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s