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Are the Jackson Children the New Gosselins?

The quickly assembled A&E Jackson brother reality project is shape-shifting again, this time to include Michael Jackson's three children. To see which Jacksons are onboard for Blanket's reality debut, follow us after the jump. (Hint: It's not just Joe.)
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Jay Leno Show's Mockery of Scripted Dramas Moves to the Next Level

As if The Jay Leno Show was not already a living, breathing, Headline-spewing mockery of the scripted programs like Southland that once stood a chance at nabbing a 10 PM slot on NBC, last night's episode condensed the abstract slight into an easy-to-understand sketch lampooning Leno's television rivals. In the video after the jump, watch Leno's skit called "Cops & Doctors," which inventively combines police procedural and medical drama for none of the laughs or excitement. It's just like Leno to hop on the mash-up bandwagon many years late.
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Michael Jackson: 0 New Albums, 5 American Music Award Nominations

The American Music Awards have long been about this country's greatest virtues: popularity and blazer-heavy dance battles. The Dick Clark-produced extravaganza began in the 1970s, and the program's top-honored music group of all time is not Pink Floyd, U2 or Radiohead, but the Backstreet Boys. And that's fine! Alison Krauss can win her goddamn statue some other day. But after this morning's nomination announcement for the 2009 ceremony, the popularity contest turned a strange corner as Michael Jackson was nominated for five awards, including two for his 2003 greatest hits album Number Ones. Movieline uncovers the explanation, as well as the chilliest award speech in AMA history, after the jump.
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What's On: Winning Hell

The chef competition reality genre is awful crowded these days, as Top Chef, Chopped, The Next Iron Chef and Hell's Kitchen compete for the lengthy attention span of armchair foodies. But HK has had a major advantage from jump street: It's on Fox. While a chef swearing or throwing something might be an OMG moment on Top Chef, that's par for the course in Gordon Ramsay's fear factory. Tonight is the finale, and while the winners rarely go on to bigger or better things, they never go gentle into that good night.
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How Will Matthew Perry's New Sitcom Pitch Help Him Rate Among His Former Friends?

While the world holds out for a Central Perk reunion movie, Matthew Perry continues his quest for post-Friends success on broadcast television. The 17 Again co-star's latest hope: a single-camera comedy he will act in, co-write and executive produce under the Sony Pictures TV umbrella. But how will it stack up against Monica and Joey's current television reincarnations?
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Southland Might Get a Second Chance With TNT

Less than a week after Movieline declared Jay Leno's first victim dead, TNT is reportedly in talks to lift Southland from NBC's mass scripted grave. The cable channel and the series' studio, Warner Bros. TV, are silently moving forward in negotiations, with a single clue from TNT: "We continually look at all programming opportunities that fit our portfolio of brands." Although Southland's move might be a bummer to anyone without a cable package, Movieline thinks that the switchover would be beneficial for both the channel and the short-ended series.
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What's On: Just One Lesbian Ratings Ploy Kiss?

While NBC's PR team has been working overtime to hype the Heroes girl-on-girl kiss tonight, Hayden Panettiere has been claiming credit for the sexually adventurous storyline: "They [the writing team] put you in relationships and I was like, 'Can I just be with a girl or something...? Let's do that." Regardless of who pulled the trigger on the girl-on-girl arc, we hope that Claire's kiss with her roommate Gretchen (Californication's Madeline Zima) can revive the show's ratings, which fell to a series low last week.
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NBC's Thanksgiving Day Parade Conspiracy

The cast of Glee was slated to lip sync perform in Macy's 83rd Annual Thanksgiving Day Parade until NBC, the event's official broadcaster for over 50 years, caught wind of Macy's negotiations and prohibited the department store from agreeing to the Fox plug. No word on whether any Simpsons floats have likewise been cut, or maybe they'll just mysteriously deflate in the background of Miley Cyrus's performance. Glee airs on Wednesday nights, opposite The Jay Leno Show's blamed lead-in Law & Order: SVU. [TMZ]

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The Simpsons Remember Their Michael Jackson Rehearsal: Sikhs, Nose and All

Since Michael Jackson's tragic death this summer, everyone from Al Sharpton to Heidi Montag has shared their memories of the King of Pop. Now, on the eve of John Ortved's The Simpsons: An Uncensored, Unauthorized History release, details have emerged about the time the Fox cartoon crew met the singer for an unprecedented location rehearsal. Instead of tiptoeing around the late artist's strangeness, The Simpsons team recalls the straight-up bizarreness of their 1991 experience, including an implicit "Don't Stare at His Nose" policy and Jackson's "sing-along guy."
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Roger Sterling Vs. the NYC Sanitation Department

In last night's Mad Men episode, Roger Sterling swiftly shitcanned Sal at the faintest whiff of deal-breaking impropriety. Today, the actor behind Roger Sterling, John Slattery, is attempting to dispose of a real life New York City deal-breaker: the sanitation department's plan to erect a $346 million facility in Slattery's beloved SoHo neighborhood.
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'You People': Mad Men Recapped

The Drapers' whirlwind Roman adventure was a distant memory in this week's Mad Men, in which Don's traditionally slippery midseason slide into self-destruction was greased more than usual with the sudsy residue of nighttime soap operas. Related: Betty won't make Don a cuckold with just any tawdry old governor's aide. And Sal! Poor Sal. Parse the moves and machinations after the jump.

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What's On: Four Puppets and a Scotsman

With Letterman's ratings spiking last week, it's more important than ever for Craig Ferguson to have a grabber at the beginning of his show. Well, the second year administrative assistant in CBS's Facilities department who is also in charged of overseeing The Late Late Show probably had a grabber of her own when she saw Tuesday night's cold open. Ferguson and two staff members donned wigs and lip sync-ed to Hanson's "mmmBop" with some puppets and an extra in a bondage outfit. Last night, Ferguson mentioned tonight's show would feature a cold open with a condor puppet so let's hope for more inspired performances.
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Law & Order: Criminal Intent Loyalists Unleash Deadly Fluffalanche

With great sadness, Movieline reported two weeks ago that Law & Order: Criminal Intent was discharging several key characters from its force including Goren and Eames, the beloved lead detective team played by Vincent D'Onofrio and Kathryn Erbe. Instead of sitting tight while Criminal Intent writers transition Jeff Goldblum's ivory-tickling, ethnic food loving, matinee-catching detective (and whichever actor they recast as his straight partner) as the program's top bananas, Goren/Eames fans are banding together. On October 16, USA Networks will be deluged with jars of marshmallow filling, the same Fluff fans allege they will be watching if the network does not renew D'Onofrio and Erbe's contracts.
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Project Runway Recap: Bride's Dress Revisited


Wedding challenges dot Project Runway's history with some special moments -- some you even want to remember. Last night's divorce-oriented challenge was an undeniable delight, marked by insane self-absorption, delusion, and the ascent of a mythological vulture god named Gordana. Revisit the parade of Polyester Brides (credit: Liz Phair) after the jump!

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Lopez Tonight Promos Setting Up Inevitable Disappointment

Autumn has begun, and while that means colorful displays of nature's brilliance and smells of cider for some parts of America, in the world of television that means TBS will start overwhelming us with wave after wave of network promo spots. Most of the year, TBS is a repository for Seinfeld reruns and Debra Messing film vehicles, but occasionally they bust out some new programming. Last year it was Frank Caliendo's cavalcade of Frank Caliendos. This year, it's George Lopez. Lopez Tonight does not premiere until November 9, but it's never to early to have the audience pleading for a show to start so the interminable promos can stop. Grab your glove, it's time to catch some buzz.
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