'Critic' Sticks Up For One For the Money
What? We ruined a perfect 0% on Rotten Tomatoes for this? "[Katherine] Heigl herself does an okay job in the role. She never quite pulls off the Jersey persona but she comes close enough. With her dyed brown hair and slightly more curvy appearance she certainly looks better than I've ever seen her look. I never thought of her as that attractive before, but she's quite sexy here. She should definitely keep the dark hair. [...] Despite the weakness of the mystery and the failure of the humor to be as funny as it should be, there is just enough of everything plus a dose of likable charm from Heigl to keep the story moving along." Get me my pitchfork and torch, please. [Three Movie Buffs]
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Ok, we get it. You think she's kind of hot. I think this man lets his libido do the reviewing. He also gave a thumbs up to Anna Faris' "What's Your Number?" and Kate Beckinsale's "Underworld Awakening." Yet, he was able to liken "A Better Life" to "The Bicycle Thief..." for this, there is no explanation.
What in the name of all that is unholy is so damn important about a 'perfect' score on RottenTomatoes? Have you read the repugnant comments to critics on that site? These are written by people who are supposedly human beings. It's astonishing!
Just about every review for this mess had the same four elements:
1)Mention that Heigl dyed her hair brown (like we wouldn't see that in the poster)
2)Comment on her vassilating Joisey accent.
3)Comparison to Snooki/ J.Shore.
4)Remark how the 18 book Plum series will not become a franchise.
How exactly did they "Armand White" this?
I think we look to Heigl to countenance for ourselves some needed, pleasing nurturance. If she looks better, and is curvier -- these are things we need to know. Save the pitchforks and torches for Frankensteins, if you please -- this most appropriate, lovely, Heigl looks to warrant your disarmament and embrace, despite her tethering background of weak mystery and failed humor.
Yes, seeing pretty people is exactly what the movies are about, right? Forget Best Actress awards. How about Most Prettiest Actress!