In Memoriam: American Idol's First Voted-Off Contestant
American Idol's Top 13 collapsed into a Top 12 last night, as the first of the finalists was voted out of the competition. Was it Blubbermaster Blubberer Jacob Lusk? Was it Selena non-threat Karen Rodriguez? What about Haley Reinhart, who has unfeeling opals for eyes? Remember the loser after the jump. Spoiler ahead!
Today we say goodbye to Ashthon Jones, who scored last place on our tally yesterday. So, uh, good job, America. But, sad! Anyway:
Legacy: Ashthon's girl-group hand gestures had us whooping. Her version of "And I Am Telling You I'm Not Going" was stirring. She may have acted like one of the more disposable members of Destiny's Child, but she'd have given Matthew Knowles some real hell on the way out.
We Will Miss Most: The '70s Diana Ross updo consisting of curly spheres and unbelievable horizontalness; the unabashed stage-ownership of her Wild Card performance; the effing glamor.
What Could've Been: A rightfully growly rendition of "Got to be Real" during Disco Week, a turnaround performance of "Hit 'Em Up Style (Oops!)" during R&B week, and a weep-inducing rendition of Lisa Lisa's "All Cried Out" (1986) during Year You Were Born week.
Closing Remarks: Ashthon, you served hot sauce during a season that veered to Casey Abrams's smoky and mild Honey Chipotle. Let's pray all your residual voters switch to Naima Adedapo, who is my American Idol and International Superstar Janitrix.
Subscribe to the new Movieline on YouTube
Comments
I bet you would sing "Tik Tok" during "Year You Were Born Week."
So, what's going on with Casey being in the hospital? Any news?
I'd be in the bottom two with you and your version of "Alexander's Ragtime Band."
He is reportedly alive.
He lives to growl another day. Whew!
You know Haley Reinhart was his growl understudy.
Great clever, biting wit. But you left out something really, really important: Ashton's singing was off-key too much (Oh, I meant the ill-used term, "pitchy"). Why, oh why the majority of this season's contestants are off-key is beyond weak television viewing.
If the damn show didn't drag on for another 'entertaining' 2+ months and America voted tomorrow, Jacob Lusk would win for the top vocalist - a voice that only comes around every 25 years or so.
Future tripping: Casey would find a record deal, spark youngsters towards love of jazz and drop one wonderful album, (albeit over-produced like Crystal's); an ungrateful and bitter Haley gets an offer for a porn film or an off-Strip Vegas nightclub and takes it; James Durbin gets some gigs singing private parties for about 6 months then fades away like former Idol mop-top Tim Urban; Karen gets picked up for a spot on Telemundo and releases one fabulous album (because she deserves it- and a longer career); Lauren finds a niche working in off-Broadway productions for a short time; Paul McDonald (who'll be in the top three) will just continue on w/ his band Grand Magnolias and operate under-the-radar like Chris (WHO?) Allen; Pia Toscano will find a place doing Broadway musicals and have a fairly steady working, decent musical stage career; Scotty will debut one fantastically produced album, have about 3 hits from it, make a second album that will bomb (because a) we all got our 'fix' with the debut one, b) we're fickle and c) he looks too much like Alfred E. Newman; Stephano will likely be the next to go as his 'pitchy' quality becomes just too obvious; Thia will get a fabulous offer to do a small film role that involves a cameo of her singing, but until this 15 year old has actually lived some of the life that she'll be singing about this season, she'll learn that being technically proficient does not an entertainer make, and no matter how many competitions you've entered since you popped out of your mother's womb, you will have no guarantees for success in the brutal industry of entertainment; and Naima - all good spirits willing- will land a second place next to winner Lusk, and she'll not only get out one very nice CD that'll carry her (like Fantasia), but, she'll get even more successful as a backer helps her realize her fashion credentials that will make it to Red Carpet fame by 2013 Grammies or other music awards shows.
Whatever does happen, AI is about 2 things:
1) Can the winner REALLY sing? (Oh- sorry, forget I said that since Ruben proved that being more than 'pitchy' doesn't matter as long as you can captivate the current public in some way)...and
2) Can the performer REALLY entertain the larger masses and SELL RECORDS or make someone else money in the log run?
We've just witnessed the last two seasons (8 & 9) as producing the top spots for contestants that didn't deserve it and the majority of the public can't even remember their names. It's the second place winners that have become REAL WINNERS to the American public and changed attitudes about stereotypes: (Adam Lambert proved that being gay, a bit effeminate and theatrical doesn't equal 'whimp', 'weak' or anything to push aside. Crystal proved that a young female can have crossover appeal on many levels with a powerful voice carrying dire truths without having to be skinny, wear short skirts or show cleavage all the time).
Hopefully, this season 10, the one with the most controlled, natural talent in delivering a song can be chosen as the top spot winner. And, that winner (Lusk) will be able to make A LOT of people A LOT of money for a very, very long time to come.