VIDEO: Watch the Future Queen of England Get Drunk and Cry in a Bathtub, Courtesy of Lifetime
The genius thing about the Lifetime Network is that it takes sensational news stories and speedily fashions them into successful made-for-TV-movies by somehow making the most unsympathetic real-life female protagonists into sympathetic characters. For instance, the chick who was engaged to the Craigslist Killer? Lifetime made her an eager bride-to-be who was too obsessed with floral arrangements to notice her fiance's knife collection under the bed. Been there! And with the network's upcoming William & Kate -- the film about the next royal couple -- Lifetime throws a teary Kate Middleton character into a bathtub with a glass of Merlot and watches her heart break in real time. The future Queen of England is just like us.
In William & Kate -- which is sadly being broadcast in 2-D on April 18, just like the actual royal wedding scheduled a week and a half later -- fictional Kate Middleton (Camilla Luddington) tries to explain that Prince William (Nico Evers-Swindell), son of the ill-fated Princess Diana and grandson of Queen Elizabeth II, is totally normal!
"He's just a guy," Middleton smugly tells a friend while wearing sporty running gear in this 30-second preview clip.
Smash cut to Prince "Just a Guy" William pheasant hunting with his father Prince Charles.
Since that "just a guy" proclamation wasn't convincing, Lifetime recruits its starring actress Luddington to appeal to viewers -- not a good sign.
"Lifetime viewers are going to get a great love story," Luddington declares before a quick montage of romantic clips.
That's fine but I think Lifetime viewers are all aware that all they are ever going to get from this network is mediocre love stories at best. And they're all fine with that.
VERDICT: Regardless of the fact that this film will be totally undeserving of my time, I will be tuning in.
· William & Kate Preview [YouTube via Zap2it]
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Comments
Right, just like us, when we are slouched against our pima-cotton bath pillow while sipping a '29 LaTour out of Baccarat stemware while lounging in a tub of hand-drawn Evian. (I'm still mortified when the wife walked in on me like that!)
They couldn't find someone who looks something like Kate? Aside from hair, I don't see it at all. And since when do the English say "guy". Is "bloke" over? Oh, Lifetime. I can quit you. And, since you dropped Frasier, I have.
The English say guy since always. And bloke is one of those words that is always used in the wrong context when Americans try to use it. 🙂
Kate is a Loser, a Hore and a Drunk she is not fit for the Royal Family any women that allows Pic. of her nude and in her underware needs to be classed as Non Royal not fit for the Royal Family.