The Trailer for Fast Five Damages Lots of Property
Can you believe that we live in a world where five versions of The Fast & The Furious exist? Me neither! But they do, and people love them. Which, despite having never seen one of the films in this franchise, I can understand: Watching property get decimated at an alarming pace is fun...especially when you don't have to clean up after all those explosions.
Vin Diesel and Paul Walker star in Fast Five as the type of robbers who like to burn money. Literally. There's probably some Robin Hood-like goodness to them -- after all, they're the stars of the show -- but that doesn't mean Dwayne Johnson doesn't want to hunt them down and arrest them. Or something. Frankly, I got distracted during that part by Johnson's absurd goatee. Not that plot matters here: Cars go fast and explode. Rise, repeat, buy tickets. Face it: As long as people keep showing up to see these films, Universal will keep making them.
VERDICT: Vroooooom.
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Comments
Christopher,
It is questionable that they let you write about a movie franchise whose films, you admit, you have never seen. It is even MORE questionable that you choose to mock films you have never seen.
I wonder why you are writing for movieline if you don't watch the movies before editorializing about them.
Jessi
Your opinion on this movie franchise will now be ignored. Until you actually know what you're talking about go climb in a hole. Why do people pay you to write movie reviews?
Good question, commenter who is most certainly not Vin Diesel!
Dwayne Johnson wants them captured and returned to the U.S. but his team has instructions to "[not] ever, ever, let them get into cars"?
Stay outside reasonable walking distance to an airport, Vin Diesel and Paul Walker, and you're home free!