5 More Programming Suggestions for Playboy TV's New 'Couples' Slate

Since they are rapidly losing male viewers (presumably to Internet porn), Playboy TV is now going after men and women with a new program slate called "TV for 2." This lineup will specifically target couples, and according the show descriptions on our sister site Deadline, it sounds like their plans aren't too far removed from mainstream reality TV. To wit: Brooklyn Kinda Love will be "a docu-reality series which follows the intricacies of four real couples' relationships." Right. Sounds like they need some help. Read my suggestions below and help brainstorm in the comments.

·Couples Big Brother

Ditch the "docu-reality series" and just put sexually active couples in a house together for a month or so with security cameras everywhere to explore the intricacies of relationships. Will they stay couples? Will they get jealous of other couples? How do their sex lives compare to ours? It could just end up like the real Big Brother reverse -- rather than strangers falling in love, this one would likely chronicle intimate partners falling out of love -- but I'm betting people will tune in anyway.

·Movies of the week... with nudity

Want men and women to tune in together? Then get whatever computer program cranks out Lifetime's made for TV Fatal Attraction ripoffs and make them steamier. Any woman who watches the Lifetime movies, which are already filled with innuendo, would tune into these and men will be lured by the titillation aspect combined with the excitement of watching it with their significant other guilt-free.

·Adult Mystery Science Theater 3000

This is the same format as the original show, except that the commentary runs over the most ludicrous adult films that the producers can unearth. And since we're going for couples here, the commentators should consist of a man, a woman, and an asexual robot. Balance!

·Red Shoe Diaries: The Reboot

Apologies to Zalman King, but in order for this reboot to be perfectly balanced and successful for couples, Adrian Lyne should executive produce (since his R-rated sex scenes are always more erotic then an entire season of Red Shoe Diaries) and the writing staff should be all female. Definitely bring back David Duchovny though.

·I Watch it for the Interviews...

You know the old joke. Playboy used to be known not just for nude women, but also for amazing interviews. And not without reason. I mean, they got Joseph Heller and Kurt Vonnegut to sit down together and they ran probably one of the most quotable Bob Dylan interviews of all time. Bring this level of depth and quality back, except for TV! Some of the kidding above aside, I'm for this.