The Mike & Molly Fat Joke Tracker: 'They Called Me Belly the Kid'

Viewers who have been tracking Mike & Molly's burgeoning relationship (and BMIs) were in for a treat last night when the super-sized sweethearts reached a very special milestone in their corpulent couple-dom: They said "I love you" to each other...and then had passionate make-up sex while wearing snakeskin boots. But who cares about the plot! Onto the fat jokes.

"Yeah you get called 'Belly the Kid' enough and it really sours you on Western footwear." -- Mike

"Hey Moon Face. How are ya?" -- Molly's mother's creepy date

"You're looking good this evening."

-- "Thanks, I had some fat sucked out of my neck waddle." -- Molly's mother and Molly's mother's creepy date

"Get this. Last Tuesday, I forgot to eat lunch. When has that ever happened? I've forgotten that I've eaten lunch a few times. And I had to have lunch again just to make sure." -- Mike, at an Overeaters Anonymous meeting

"Wait, you had another woman hit on you at an OA meeting? I need to pack on 80 pounds and get my fat ass down to church." -- Mike's best friend

"How big is this dirty girl? Are we talking Texas toast or just Texas? -- Mike's best friend

"Did I ever tell you about the time I went to Mike's and baked him those sugarless, non-fat, non-dairy cookies? [...] Do you know what Mike said? He said 'Wow. These cookies suck.' And then he ate four more." -- Molly

"You taste like Toll House cookies and marijuana." -- Mike to Molly