What's On: Dancing with the Stars Wants to Tell You a Story

The theme for tonight's Dancing with the Stars is pretty awesome and should also fill you with terror. How much schmaltz can one Movieline reader put up with? Hopefully it's a lot, because tonight's episode will reach record levels. Bring a Geiger counter.

Dancing with the Stars [ABC, 8 PM]

It doesn't get much better than this: The contestants must "tell a story" with their dances this week. Suggestions, anyone? Bristol Palin stumbles upon a Wasillan gold mine using a cha cha cha? Jennifer Grey explores the Red Dawn in a sultry salsa? Audrina Patridge texts Lo Bosworth through a waltz? There's some bad news to report as well:

The Event [NBC, 9 PM]

Thanks to the Martinez administration's plan to make Sophia open up about the detainees' intentions, a new detainee comes to the fore (Clea DuVall). I only expect Laura Innes to get more chilling from here.

Real Housewives of Atlanta [Bravo, 9 PM]

All hail season three! Kim Zolciak is early for this party, and in tonight's premiere she's dealing with the aftermath of a candid interview she gave to a tabloid. Nene deals with rumor control, Khandi starts to date again, and new castmates Phaedra Parks and Cynthia Bailey join the show.

O Brother, Where Art Thou? [ABC Family, 7:30 PM]

The Coen brothers' strangely meandering, engrossing folk tale follows a trio of convicts (George Clooney, John Turturro, Tim Blake Nelson) and their journey into a Depression-era version of pop stardom. Parallels to Homer's The Odyssey are easy to draw here. Funny enough, the movie achieved a real version of pop stardom with the film's soundtrack, which hit #1 on Billboard's Top 200 albums chart and won the Grammy for Album of the Year.