Movieline Recasts the Failed Summer Blockbusters
The L.A. Times goes overboard with its Inception coverage today, putting the Warner Bros. release on the front page of the business section with a story about how its box-office success is anything but a slam dunk. (Hmm, where have I read that before?) Cited amongst the reasons is the iffy starpower of Leonardo DiCaprio when compared with other A-listers like Will Smith and Brad Pitt. And, as it turns out, both of those actors were considered to lead Inception before DiCaprio signed on. If only! Why not apply this interesting production footnote to the other would-be blockbusters released already this summer? It's time to recast the failures!
· Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time
Problem: Hey, remember when this movie existed? While the overseas total of over $230 million has been nice, that Jerry Bruckheimer's summer kickoff could only gross $89 million domestically is a bit embarrassing. Perhaps despite some washboard abs and Tim Riggins-like hair, Jake Gyllenhaal just isn't that famous.
Solution: To complete an almost-circle, replace Jake with Tobey Maguire.
· The A-Team
Problem: Whether it was because of the 37 screenwriters, the overwrought special effects or the fact that no one actually wanted to see a remake of The A-Team, the Fox actioner was one of the year's disappointments.
Solution: But that's nothing a better cast couldn't fix! Keep Bradley Cooper, but toss everyone else overboard. Sharlto Copley might have been the best part of the film, but he's not Owen Wilson -- gone! "Rampage" Jackson was good for a few quotes, but he isn't The Rock! And Liam Neeson might be a bad ass, but he's no match for the silky smooth charm of George Clooney. Now that's a blockbuster cast. As for director Joe Carnahan: Is Brian De Palma available?
· Knight & Day
Problem: Putting everything about Tom Cruise aside for a moment, the fact is that he's currently a tired brand name. You don't see Tom Hanks lighting up box-office records any more either -- unless, of course, he's voicing a toy. Plus, we've all seem him in this role template before. It was just done too many times.
Solution: Short of Taylor Lautner and Taylor Swift taking the lead roles, how does this sound: Cruise as the villain (so long Peter Sarsgaard!), Steve Carell in the Cameron Diaz role and Angelina Jolie as the special agent. Tell me that wouldn't be more appealing.
· Jonah Hex
Problem: Everything.
Solution: Betty White.
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Comments
But then who would shake some on as Salt this summer?
Angie can do both! Like how Jonah Hill has been in two movies this summer. Or something.
Yes! This is the answer! Jonah Hill as Jonah Hex! Jonah Hill instead of Tom Cruise! Jonah Hill is the new Betty White!
I don't think anybody could sell Prince of Persia. Can we please put the final nail in the video game adaptation coffin... DID YOU JUST SEE THAT HALO COMMERCIAL? ZOMG!
Salt is perfectly marketable as it is, though casting Angie as a double agent with a TWIN (double double agents, SEE?) is not that bad of an idea either!
Is that really the ending to the movie, cause if it is your fucken jackass.
i'd just like to say that i loved a-team. i wouldn't have changed anything about it. saw it twice. it was funny, the acting was great all around, the fighting was kick ass, and yes the tank scene was a little insane, but it was funny the whole way.
SHARLTO IS GOD. YOU FOOKING SAY HE IS THE BEST PART OF THE MOVIE AND THEN YOU CHANGE HIM WITH WILSON? THIS IS PATHETIC MAN.
RAGEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Sorry Sharlto.
"Replace Jake with Tobey Maguire"
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hrrmmm...
How about Zayed Khan?
GOD FORGIVES YOU. :3
But A-Team was good!
why is Wilson better than Sharlto please explain?
From a box office standpoint, Owen Wilson is a major star; Copley, as yet, is not.
Iffy star power of Leonardo Dicaprio? Lets see, Dicaprio was in one of the highest grossing movies of all time ( Titanic). One of his movies won an Oscar for best film ( The Departed), just to name a few. I find it difficult to see how that equates to iffy star power.
That makes even more sense to me, because when I bought the ticket at the movies, I asked to see Jonah Hill.
The A-Team was actually a good summer action pic. It will be huge on dvd, mark my words.
Well, Brad, Titanic was 13 years ago, and for every decent return (Catch Me If You Can, The Departed), there's more than one underachiever (The Man in the Iron Mask, The Beach, Blood Diamond, Body of Lies, Revolutionary Road). That's what's called "iffy star power."
One thing's for sure, there will be absolutely no need to replace Adrien Brody in Predators. dude was pretty amazing.