5 Ways the Lohans' New Reality Show Could Be Better Than Living Lohan

The Lohan family is not about to let their first critically-panned reality series deter them from making another critically-panned reality series. Just today, Dina Lohan announced that the family -- including Lindsay -- has already begun filming a project which will document the Lohans as they promote their businesses and prove that they are just a "a good, hardworking family." Movieline recognizes this is destined to be another exploitative mess muddying our airwaves but in the spirit of Dina's bottomless optimism, we would still like to point out five ways that this project could be less horrible than its predecessor Living Lohan.

1. The Network Caps Dina and Ali's Combined Screen Time at 1 Minute Each Week

Anderson Cooper said it best during an episode of Live with Regis and Kelly that he happened to be guest-hosting a few years ago: "I cannot believe I'm wasting a minute of my life watching these horrific people." The horrific people to whom he was referring were Dina and Ali, who plagued the show's nine lackluster episodes on E! The pair read tabloids together, fought over puppies, complained about the press and found new ways to top each other's previous attention-seeking ways.

2. No More Music! No Singles, No Music Videos, No Pop Tracks With Shamelessly Self-Promoting Producers

Even though Dina made it very clear in her statement that the series will follow the family as they hawk their own businesses, the series would be infinitely more enjoyable if the family at least pretends that they are motivated by more than fame or money. This means -- even if Lindsay is involved -- no discussions about leggings, fashion lines, music or scents.

3. The Lohans: A Family Intervention

This would be the ideal format for the Lohan family and a perfect fit for A&E (which is probably one of the "major networks" in negotiations with the Lohans). Not only would this title create the most buzz for a Lohan television project, it would give the family a chance to be honest with America. The family is exploiting the same machine that made and broke them so they must be willing to play the game so that viewers sympathize. The Lohans should be frank about their experiences and subject themselves to a joint intervention against substances, publicity, and while they're at it -- bad reality shows.

4. Focus On Lindsay As She Rebuilds Her Career

In keeping with the previous tip, the series would be best served as a completely honest portrayal as Lindsay -- who has lost her credibility in the box office -- attempts to rebuild her career, one drug test at a time. Cameras could follow as Lindsay pounds the pavement, re-enrolls in acting classes, repairs her reputation with volunteer work and practices the racy lines of her upcoming film about a porn actress, Lovelace, with her grandmother.

5. Do Not Waste Episodes Plugging the Maloof Family

During the family's first show in 2008, Dina and Ali moved to Las Vegas so that Ali could record her first album for the Maloof record label while living inside the Maloof's hotel The Palms. Coincidentally, Gavin and Phil Maloof were producers of the show, a credit which made viewers feel violated by Dina.

· Lohan Family Working Around New Reality Show [NYP]