5 Heroes Who'd Benefit From Marvel's Rumored Short Films
Does the thought of sitting through The Avengers -- with its jumble of superheroes both old (Iron Man) and new (Hawkeye) -- make you recoil in disgust? Good news: You're not alone. While superhero fatigue might not be an American Medical Association recognized disease, it sure feels legitimate. And perhaps Marvel has read that writing on the wall -- or maybe they're hoping the obvious schadenfreude they experienced this weekend over the DC Comics bomb Jonah Hex doesn't come back and bite them in the ass. Either way: Rumors are swirling that -- like PIxar -- the comic book studio will start producing short films to run in front of their tentpole releases as a way to tell stories with the characters who aren't ready to make A-squad. Good idea! But which 5 Marvel heroes would benefit from this most? Embrace your inner Comic Book Guy and click ahead to find out.
· Ant-Man
As far as I can tell, Edgar Wright and Marvel are still planning on making this film for release in 2012, which is fitting since a feature length version of Ant-Man would help ring in the apocalypse. Thankfully there is still time to fix this obvious mistake: Stay small (pun!), keep it brief and attach Ant-Man to Iron Man 3D. Simple!
· Aquaman
Thanks to Entourage, the only way audiences would believe in a full-length version of Aquaman would be if it was directed by James Cameron. And unless you transport Aquaman to Pandora, that probably isn't happening anytime soon. [CORRECTION: As the smart commenter below notes, Aquaman is a DC Comics character and not Marvel. The moral: There are too many comic book characters.]
· Deadpool
Besides the fact that Ryan Reynolds already has a superhero franchise (The Green Lantern; take that, Marvel!), there's the little fact that Deadpool was decapitated at the end of X-Men Origins: Wolverine, meaning future full-length movie prospects will be harder to come by. Oh sure, his detached head winked at the camera during the post-credits scene (yep, that happened), but just the marketing effort alone (1) to remind people who Deadpool is, and (2) to explain how his head got reattached, seems like a colossal waste of money.
· The Hulk
Marvel is 0-for-2 on adaptations of The Hulk and maybe that's because people best remember the character in short, episodic bursts. Think of the avant garde possibilities of an Incredible Hulk short film. Each one could consist of Bruce Banner trying to stay calm in the face of daily indignities, like commuting to work or dealing with TPS reports. Then, HULK SMASH and credits.
· Thor
If only Marvel thought of the short films conceit before greenlighting/spending millions on Thor. The list of box office poison-level offenses here is long: Unfamiliar character, weirdly un-comic book-y tone, ancient setting, a magical hammer. Poised to be Marvel's first dud, if there's any way for the studio to cut Kenneth Branagh's film down into ten minute chunks, surely they're looking into it.
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Comments
Love this idea. And hey, if any property has the cache to work... wait for it... on the Internet, why not this? Web distribution, Marvel -- embrace the future!
Love this idea. And hey, if any property has the cache to work... wait for it... on the Internet, why not this? Web distribution, Marvel -- embrace the future!
Aquaman is a DC comics character and not a Marvel one. Submariner is the most Aquaman like person in the Marvel universe.
Yikes, and so you are correct. Thanks for the heads up.
I grew up in the Marvel Age. Nobody read Ant-Man, so they changed him to Giant-Man. Nobody read that either so they got rid of his individual stories and just made him a part of the Avengers. Nobody STILL cared about him so they made him into Yellowjacket. However, his girlfriend, the Wasp, was rich, hot and sassy, so let's concentrate on her instead, huh?
They should go deep...real deep: do a short about Wong, Doctor Strange's mysterious major domo and major mystic badass. Sort of like an 'Alfred' short from Batman, except Wong is young, and could possibly score a chick.
This post needs more Dazzler.
Are they doing the new version of Ant-Man, where he is the anti-hero/d-bag? Essentially that guy drinking beer in hell but with the shrinking and ant-communicating powers.
Deadpool is also very hot in the comics world right now for whatever reason.
This is a lousy list... Dismissing the already acknowledged fact that one of the characters isn't even a Marvel property, Deadpool seems to already be on track to being made (and who cares about how his character ended in Wolverine, it's a comic book character). It's opinion that Hulk has struck out twice, a lot of people liked the second movie, plus we're talking about introducing characters here, not characters that have had 2 movies in the last 7 years. And again, Thor is already being made. It's much too late to decide to produce a short to introduce a character that's already having a feature film released shortly. The whole point of this is to introduce characters to theatrical audiences to see if there is any interest for a full length film. This list seems to have missed that point, with the exception of 1 character... Oh, and not everyone is disgusted with the idea of an Avengers movie or any other new superhero movies. Some of us enjoy the good ones...
A lot of Marvel heroes don't seem strong enough material for a full-length movie. It'd be hard to make a Doc Strange flick work, for example, but a short would let him take his place in the mythos. Quicksilver's another - maybe that one's a 10-minute movie in the theaters, but when you slow it down there's a 90-min running time.
Trouble is, once you get through Iron Man, Spidey and (some of) the X-Men, there's a quite a few lame and/or unrelatable heroes in the Marvel universe. So how about looking at some of the villains instead? A 10-minute spot showing us how the Vanisher (Amaury Nolasco) uses his powers to juggle three dates on the same night - or Stiltman (Ben Stiller) getting stuck at 50 storeys high and having to watch his car get towed. Could be fun.
According to comics Deadpool has a healing factor equal or greater than wolverine's. His head was severed on the comic and it got reattached as easily as putting it in contact with his neck.
Another correction for ya the first Hulk Film Released was a huge BOMB and laughable at best...it did not get very good ratings so the Hulk is 1-1 and also the biggest Box office Bombs for Marvel as a major release was Dare Devil and X-Men 3 both were a stretch for them to find reviews that were not horrific...they have had several others in the past...being Captain America circa 70/80's and The Fantastic 4 from the 70's which really never made it to the Box office it was that bad. Marvel is very careful about what projects to Green light now a days the audience has a high expectation, and they are in heavy competition with D.C. who has had its major share of success as of recent.
The animated DVD of Strange managed to be compelling. They should release that theatrically instead of a live action one.