The Hills Reality Check: Audrina's Ray-Ban Tears and Another Catfight

This may sound shocking, but last night's episode of The Hills was actually enjoyable and reminiscent of earlier, better seasons. The cast members expressed feelings that could pass as genuine: Justin Bobby realized that Audrina deserves a partner who will respect her, Kristin and Brody bonded over their hatred of a mutual acquaintance and Audrina ran out of a Ryan Cabrera concert in tears. In short, it was a truly timeless installment of the Hills franchise that will forever be remembered by fans as "The One Where Justin Bobby Wasn't a Total Jerk and Stephanie Made a Salad." For further analysis, join me after the jump to assess which moments hit Movieline's Real/Fake Jackpot.

REAL: Audrina's Ray-Ban Tears

Coincidentally, that is the name of Ryan Cabrera's next single. Poor Audrina. During last night's episode, the Hills' only brunette found herself "Trapped Between a Rocker and a Hard Place." Don't credit me with that phrase -- that is actually the title that MTV gave last night's episode.

But honestly, everyone has been there. You are dating a C-list rock star who insists on high-fiving all of your friends instead of just shaking their hands like a normal person and as much as you want to love him and his six-inch spiked hair, you can't. Because you are still in love with your bad-boy ex who mistreated you time after time. But maybe he has changed because you heard him tell MTV's cameras that you deserve the world. You try to still play the supportive girlfriend to the C-list rock star by attending his radio station-sponsored outdoor concert but all you can think about is that ex. The C-list rock star dedicates a love song to you and you can't take it -- your bottom lip starts quivering, your Ray-Bans fog up, MTV's camera zooms in on your face and you run out of the venue, sad and confused.

I think every viewer with a heart and a collection of cute bandeau bikini tops felt for Audrina last night because they have been there. And they knew that Audrina's tears were real because MTV subtly pointed them out with subtitles.

FAKE: Kristin Needs a Reason to Start a Fight

Ever since Spencer was forced off the show to fulfill an anger-management class requirement last month, Kristin has stepped up as the scrappiest Hills player. For the past three episodes, she has instigated nonsense catfights with a new cast member named McKaela for no reason and last night's episode was no different. After producers presumably told Kristin that her motive in this scene was to "fight with someone" Kristin pulled this argument out of thin air.

Kristin: How innocent and sweet can you be when you are friends with Allie Lutz?

Allie: Kristin, I --

Kristin: You use the innocent sweetheart thing too many times. People may say I'm a b*tch but at least I'm honest and I'm not trying to be someone, I'm not OK?

McKaela: I don't need a lecture on life right now.

Kristin: Well then get the f*ck out of here. Leave!