Axe Brick Tamland, and 9 Other Ways to Close the $30 Million Budget Gap on Anchorman 2

I've never been much of a believer that Anchorman 2 would happen. It had its window around 2006 or so; now the economics don't work and the global box office prospects are underwhelming. Nevertheless, where there's a will, there's a way to overcome a reported $30 million budget gap between Paramount and the film's high-wattage producers and stars. Some tough, serious cuts and considerations will be required, though. Read on for a a few recommendations that spring immediately to mind; as always, your own are welcome in the comments.

+$70 million: Producers' projected Anchorman 2 budget

-$10 million: Coax a 25-percent increase in Paramount's budget by acceding to Anchorman 2: Burgundy in 3-D.

-$5 million: Follow through on the updating suggested at the end of the first Anchorman, thus invalidating the need for elaborate period costumes, wigs, props and set design.

-$4 million: Scrap Brick Tamland altogether as an incarcerated Bush Administration stooge who finally succeeded in leaking a CIA agent's name after three failed attempts.

-$3 million: Replace Paul Rudd with Sam Worthington.

-$2.5 million: Product placement earned by replacing Ron Burgundy's virtuosic flute-playing with Guitar Hero.

-$2 million: Tax credits earned by relocating the gang to KWBQ, the CW affiliate in sunny, beautiful Albuquerque, N.M.

-$1.5 million: Hire Tyler Perry to direct.

-$1 million: Make Perry and Will Ferrell share a trailer.

-$600,000: Replace Christina Applegate with Mischa Barton.

-$400,000: Switch all fonts used in the credits, marketing and promotion to Papyrus. If it's good enough for Avatar, then it's good enough for Anchorman 2.

= $40 million: Paramount's maximum budget allowance.

How's my math? Do you have other, more preferable adjustments?

· Anchorman 2 Budget Gap $30 Million As Paramount And Filmmakers Regroup [Deadline]