R-Patz: I Look Like A Tranny

Twilight will be firmly in his sights if he's to host the MTV Movie Awards but even so, Aziz Ansari faces some tough decisions. Which jokes are too obvious? Too offensive to the Twi-hards who'll make up a large chunk of the audience? And now -- breaking! -- there's the bummer of your foil spoiling the laughs by 'fessing to exactly what much of the over-16 population of this planet has been saying for a few years.

"You get to the point where you think, OK, I look like a transvestite now" -- that's the quote Britain's rag The Sun is attributing to R-Patz in reference to his vampiric regime of powder and plucking.

Pattinson supposedly -- The Sun has a way with the 'truth' when it comes to R-Patz -- also said he didn't know why girls find him attractive and that the gay sex scenes in Little Ashes were just as awkward as scenes he's done with the ladies.

Everywhere today, tweens may be feeling odd about themselves. And in a specific somewhere Tim Curry [last credit as the voice of Philippe in straight-to-video Barbie And The Three Musketeers] may be looking through his scrapbook and asking, "Why not me?"