What You Will Be Watching Instead of the Winter Olympics: Week 1
Following months of world championships and decades of training, the finest athletes in the world will gather in Vancouver tonight for the 2010 Winter Olympics. In the tradition conceived long ago in ancient Greece, they will put aside their countries' political differences, bask in multi-million dollar brand sponsorships, snap up as much hardware as their muscular necks will support and then unwind afterward by bedding their competitors in an Olympic Village orgy. But just because NBC sunk a ghastly $2 billion into the broadcasting rights to this year's games does not mean that we, American viewers, are actually obligated to watch. So after the jump, Movieline has neatly compiled your primetime alternatives to that grating Bob Costas coverage for your counter-programming pleasure.
*All listings are EST
Friday, February 12
Opening Ceremony [9 PM, NBC]
The 2010 Olympic Winter Games kick off from the BC Place in Vancouver, with the first-ever indoor Opening Ceremony. Nelly Furtado, Sarah McLachlan and Bryan Adams are among the performers rumored to participate in tonight's events. Also, the recent "We Are the World" remake is scheduled to debut at some point during NBC's coverage of the ceremony. (*NBC is promoting the events as starting at 7:30 PM EST but pre-game analysis and ski jumping reports begin at that time.)
The Graduate [8 PM, TCM]
Instead of watching the culmination of hundreds of Olympic dreams, you can watch Anne Bancroft extract the innocence from Dustin Hoffman. Mr. Ebersol, you're trying to seduce us, aren't you? Well, it isn't working.
Saturday, February 13
Men's Short Track [8 PM, NBC]
Five-time medalist (and Dancing with the Stars champion) Apolo Ohno goes after gold in the men's 1500m (broadcast live ET). NBC will also air footage of women's mogul freestyle skiing and men's downhill Alpine skiing.
Cast of Fresh Prince of Bel-Air: Where Are They Now [8 PM, TV Guide]
You could watch men in skintight uniforms speed skate in circles -- or you could see which unemployed Fresh Prince alums were available to reminisce on-camera for the show's 20th anniversary. Y-ohno homes, smell ya later.
Sunday, February 14
Women's Super Combined [7 PM, NBC]
Lindsey Vonn, the super star ski racer projected to be the "Michael Phelps of the Winter Olympics" revealed a few days ago that she suffered a bruised shin, hurting her chances of medaling in her five scheduled events. Nevertheless, Vonn is still expected to compete in this Valentine's Day event. NBC will also air coverage of figure skating (pairs short) tonight.
The Simpsons [8 PM, Fox]
Why settle for an excruciatingly long broadcast of a sport that sounds like a brand of maxi pad when you could watch The Simpson's 22-minute spin on the Winter Games. In the episode titled "Boy Meets Curl," Homer and Marge try curling at the Olympic trials. Watch out for a Bob Costas cameo.
Monday, February 15
Pairs Figure Skating [8 PM, NBC]
The first figure skating medal is at stake during tonight's free skate finals. Take note that American skater Amanda Evora (whose skates with Mark Ladwig) is dating Jeremy Barrett (who skates with Caydee Denney). NBC will also air coverage of snowboarding finals (men's SBX) and speed skating (men's 500m).
The Bachelor: On the Wings of Love [8 PM, ABC]
If you don't like watching highly talented couples performing sports, here is the exact opposite: highly edited people with little-to-no talent faking love for the cameras. Tonight, Jake and the three remaining bachelorettes travel to a Caribbean island for private helicopter tours and the chance to steal away to the fantasy suite.
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Comments
Go Johnny Queer, Go! (I can say that). But, seriously, isn't Evan Lysacek favored to win over Johnny? (see, I told you I could say that.)
Except for The Graaduate, none of your choices were the least bit better than the olympics. Mercifully, the networks rerun their episodes online, so i'll be catching up on LOST, HEROES and THE SIMPSONS that i've missed for one reason or another.
It was as if Bob Costas recycled the same remarks from the 2006 Winter Olympics. Once again Bob Costas was not respectful to the Olympic spirit of sportsmanship and endless possible dreams for all the athletes who entered the stadium during the roll call of nations. Almost from the beginning Costas mentioned that some countries had no chance of winning a medal. In the case of Jamaica, Costas remarked they “will not be much of a factor.’ Those comments are just demeaning to smaller nations with the same Olympic dreams as the larger ones.
In other words Bob Costas was saying ‘thanks for showing up.’ That the other athletes from nations with less national resources, or corporate sponsorship might not somehow show the world a medal winning performance is not just shoddy sports journalism, it also reeks of an ethnocentric mindset that Costas has shown before. That it is wrong to make such statements is obvious. The Olympic ideal trumps nationalism and world politics. It is supposed to be the place where the human spirit is on display, and the individual abilities are tested. To count athletes out before the games started is a shallow way to broadcast an event. It is also a misguided way of looking at the world.