10 Tips for the Makers of Ghostbusters 3

6. Be scary!

...That shouldn't be read as some sort of exhortation to make Ghostbusters 3 a G-rated romp. Part of the reason the first two films succeeded is that they scared the crap out of kids, then made them laugh (later, those same kids would experience a rush of giddy fear and laughter while watching Scream). Don't make all the ghosts cute and cuddly just to qualify them for fast food tie-ins.

7. No Alyssa Milano

When the LAT asked Dan Aykroyd last summer who he'd like to see play a 'buster in Ghostbusters 3, he lobbied hard for the "amazing" Alyssa Milano, who provided a voice in the Ghostbusters video game. Alyssa Milano, I'm sure you are a delightful woman, and I like the Dodgers too, but you may want to stop reading right about here: Producers, you can do better.

8. No immediately dated cultural references

When Ghostbusters 2 came out in 1989, I was a nine-year-old video game junkie who could recite the Zelda II instructional booklet from memory. However, even I was mortified when Bill Murray began to control a slime-wrapped Statue of Liberty using nothing but an NES Advantage joystick. Let that be a lesson to you: Don't blindly stuff your film full of youth-pandering pop culture detritus, or you'll regret it.

9. Be careful about integrating the old cast

You wouldn't think that Ghosbusters 3 had much to learn from 90210 or Melrose Place, but both of those rebooted properties experienced growing pains when the new cast members were forced to battle the returning regulars for screen time. If you're going to keep everyone from Dan Aykroyd to Annie Potts around, how do you expect the new Ghostbusters to establish themselves as franchise leads? Which brings me to my last bit of advice...

10. Are you sure about that Bill Murray/ghost thing?

Sigourney Weaver recently divulged that not only will her onscreen son Oscar be suiting up as a Ghostbuster, but Bill Murray will be returning in ghost form. There's admittedly a certain cleverness to the idea, but it's limiting story-wise and for Murray as an actor -- how will he be able to spark off of the other characters if he's superimposed later after doing two days of green-screen work by himself? Bill Murray's already done his comedy cameo for this generation, and it was in Zombieland. Are you sure you won't want Murray alive in Ghostbusters 5? Be bold, but don't cross the streams.

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