The 12,775 Temporary Loves of Warren Beatty's Life
Which brings us to Mr. Fields, who issued this statement on the book to The Huffington Post over the weekend:
"Mr. Biskind's tedious and boring book on Mr. Beatty was not authorized by Mr. Beatty and should not be published as an authorized biography," Fields says. "It contains many false assertions and purportedly quotes Mr. Beatty as saying things he never said. Other media should not repeat things from the book on the assumption that they are true or that the book is an authorized biography."
"Tedious and boring" may have been a step too far, as Biskind -- for all his preoccupation with the spelunking adventures of Lil' Beatty -- also gives Beatty his due as a creative force to be reckoned with. He credits him with making five "defining motion pictures" that cement his status as a "great" filmmaker, and, if the first 100 pages are any indication, he goes to great lengths to document their production and reception. For the man who so visibly thrived on the Cecil B. DeMille Award spotlight at the 2007 Golden Globes, lingering and reminiscing at the podium to the point of awkwardness, this "tedious and boring" book will surely be read from cover to cover. Will it occupy a permanent place in the Beatty household? Possibly, buried in some office desk drawer, far from the disapproving eyes of lucky Mrs. 12,776.
Here's Beatty in the 2007 Golden Globes press room after his lengthy presentation and acceptance speech, where a reporter asks how he felt about the skirt-chasing jokes. His somewhat resigned response: "Fine. Fine." And after a pause: "Annette is fine with it."
· EXCLUSIVE: Warren Beatty's Attorney Denies Biskind Bio Is Authorized [HuffPo]
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Comments
That jibe about Ms. Fonda unhinging her jaw sure sounds like Warren, given that it is a front-hand compliment to his own endowment. This way anytime he was denied the shot at being pleased via fellacio he can attribute the refusal to the target being challenged orally by his stature.
I have got to side with Peter Biskind on this one - I haven't read the biography, but Biskind wrote Easy Riders, Raging Bulls, which is really just one of the best books about movies of all time.
Let's do some "simple arithmetic", shall we?
Beatty is 72. He lost his virginity at 20. He married Bening in 1992. That gives him 35 years as a player. 12,775 conquests equates to EXACTLY one woman per day, every day, for that three and a half decades -- and that's not including drive-bys, glory holes, reacharounds, heffalumps, holy-molies and grand cleft autos?
I'm saying the clever Mr Biskind pulled this figure out of his nether regions for precisely this kinda publicity.
Sorry, I neglected to factor in the leap years - as did Mr Biskind. So we are to presume that every four years Beatty made February 29 his sex-free day? Otherwise, let's keep it real and call his tally 12,883.
"drive-bys, glory holes, reacharounds, heffalumps, holy-molies and grand cleft autos"
Sounds like New Years Eve over at George Michael's house....