Mad Men Power Rankings, Week Thirteen: 'Well, Gentlemen, I Suppose You're Fired.'
2. Betty Draper (down) Last week: 1
"Dearest Henry,
It's done. I've told Don it's over, it's finally over, I'm seeing a divorce lawyer (I supposed I don't need to tell you this, since he's your lawyer), and soon I'll be in Reno with you and Baby Gene for six weeks of residence-establishing bliss as we prepare for a quickie dissolution of my failed marriage. Why am I writing to you, while you're asleep next to me on this airplane? While I certainly enjoy not having to sneak around anymore, I feel that our relationship could use a touch of the breath-stealing excitement of the days where our only contact was through the mail, with me sending you perfumed, painstakingly hand-crafted expressions of my ardor, and you returning same, occasionally sketching fun cartoons of your throbbing manhood in the margins of your otherwise quite sober correspondence. It's the kind of heady romance I could previously only dream of between chapters in my favorite Joan Austin novels. But now we shall be together always (until I get bored, haha!), you, me, the baby, and the other two. I hope they're OK living with Carla for six weeks. I get the sense she doesn't quite approve of our relationship, as she's given me some quite withering looks -- the nerve! -- each time your name comes up. Oh well. She'll learn to keep her nasty thoughts to herself or she'll be looking for a new batch of brats to watch when we return. I'm sure the help we hire together will be much more open-minded about the whole thing. I'm thinking a cook, a maid, and maybe a nanny? Then we'll have more time together where you can tell me about how you're going to provide for my every need and never fool around on the side like certain other husbands of mine. Anyway, we can discuss this later. You look so peaceful sleeping there on that tiny pillow, a thin stream of drool creeping out of the corner of your mouth. Be well, my prince. You'll be so surprised to find this note waiting on your tray table when you lurch awake during some light turbulence!
Yours forever,
B."
Subscribe to the new Movieline on YouTube
Comments
I have to say that the Don Draper Fingerbang Threat Level has been my favorite part of the entire internet for the past few months, and I might even miss it more than the show.
When the show gets to the 70s I hope they give Joan, Sal and Peggy a variety hour. With cut-ins before commercial breaks from Roger Sterling.
not gonna lie, i clapped when roger's eyes lit up. also, i think sally is gonna end up a cutter. of betty.
This was a top notch episode (perhaps my fav of the series so far). I WAS cheering for Joan when she stepped in the office and was laughing my ass off at the way she answered the phone in the hotel/office of SCDP.
Also, I for one was on the edge of my seating during the Draper Push-Around '09. I realize domestic abuse is not funny but I thought how he got her awake was dangerous but also hilarious (re-reading that, apparently I have issues).
@Mikeylikestv- I couldn't agree more. That and the PatricideWatch (which I will lobby till by dying day should be changed to the MatricideWatch) made me make sure I was around the tv 10pmEST every Sunday. What the hell are we going to do now with the Rankings and the Fingerbang Threat Level on hiatus?
@Lisanti- thank you so much for this, it really made the show that much more awesome this year. However, no Cobra In a Basket "Not Ranked" (although mentioned previously)?
1) I did actually cheer when Joan strutted in
2) I immediately thought of the FRIDAY NIGHT LIGHTS connection as well.
ah the week 13 power rankings. a lovely bow atop an excellent season for all. i did laugh out loud when joanie said the new name. bravo mark.
This is the only season so far where the finale has been far and away the best episode.... and may I say, THANK GOD because we needed it.
Yes, anyone who wasn't cheering when Joan walked in is obviously dead inside and probably kicks puppies.
Also: Index Draper would have been a brilliant Halloween costume. There's always next year, I suppose.
I enjoyed the Power Rankings as always.
I didn't get the "Joan Austin" reference in Betty's letter though. Was it a major typo, a comment on Betty's spelling skills, a sign that she's never really read Jane Austen, or a real life 1960's romance novelist so obscure that my Google search couldn't find her?
I'm going to miss these! I look forward to them every week.
Henry comes across as really smarmy and possessive. Betty is going from one crappy marriage to another.
I most certainly let out a whoop when Joanie sauntered into the room like a cleaner ready to fix everything. What an amazing episode. All of the pieces just fell into place, and I didn't even see them falling.
I'll miss the power rankings greatly. And I chuckled every time I even thought of the 'Don Draper Fingerbang Threat Level'. That is brilliant.
"Sometimes, the best fingerbanging is the one you never give."
you ain't never lied lisanti, you ain't never lied
Great Roger line when they're leaving and Don's about to lock the door. Great finale.
Betty is just a dumb blonde so to speak.
Great series of columns!
So good.
So where does the next season start? A year later? Where can they go from here? I'm hoping far enough into the 60s where Vietnam, the start of hippies, and race riots explode. 65?
My predictions:
Don will be shacked up with someone completely new.
He and Betty will have hot-extra-ex-marital sex at some point, no? Fingerbetty'd.
The wardrobes will change.
Cooper will have expired.
Joan's hubby deployed to Vietnam.
Sally will run away.
Great episode, great Power Ranking.....woe is me...what am I gonna do without you Lisanti?
Is Joan not "up" because it's been such a down year for her in general? I know it would've been completely ridiculous, but I was hoping she would *also* be made a partner. Who didn't cheer when she showed up? I want names because a new agency needs a new fingerbang to-do list.
And yes, Don needs a few months to rest those fingers, because the single (and loving it) Don Draper will push them to their very breaking points in the months to come.
Mark, thank you for a season of my favorite Internet column ever.
I knew it was coming, but still: when mildly exasperated Lane Pryce said "We don't know how any of this works", I jumped up and shouted at the TV, "I know someone who knows how it works!"
Cheers, Mr. Lisanti, for excellently enhancing the enjoyment - cheers.
So obvious it was going to be Joan the moment Roger went to make a phonecall. Great episode though, annoyed at having to wait [x] time until the next season 🙁
I found that getting on any type of cable machine, seated or standing, and doing one arm fly's across your body. This allows you a greater range of motion since instead of stopping and meeting hands in the middle, you can continue across your whole body. Alternate right, left, right, left, etc.
I drop a comment when I especially enjoy a article on a site
or if I have something to add to the conversation. Usually it is a result of the fire communicated
in the article I looked at. And after this post Mad Men Power
Rankings, Week Thirteen: ?Well, Gentlemen, I Suppose You?re Fired.? - Movieline.
I was actually moved enough to create a thought :
) I do have a few questions for you if it's okay.
Could it be just me or do a few of these responses come
across like they are left by brain dead individuals?
😛 And, if you are writing on other online social sites, I'd like to follow anything fresh you have to post.
Could you make a list all of all your shared sites like your Facebook page,
twitter feed, or linkedin profile?