Mad Men Power Rankings, Week Eleven: 'This Name Is Poisoned'
6. Annabelle Mathis (up) Last week: unranked
Modern cougar technology wasn't really developed until 1967's The Graduate, so poor, newly widowed Ms. Mathis was forced to follow her libido back to Sterling Cooper, back to Roger, rather than just taking her dead husband's money and spending the rest of her days feasting on dim twentysomething men with a taste for nice things and an easy life. Oh well, she gave it the old college try, even if Roger (shockingly!) wasn't willing to run around on his still-shiny trophy wife.
7. Peggy Olson (down) Last week: 4
"I can't turn it off, it's actually happening!"
Sometimes Mad Men is the funniest show on television.
8. Miss Farrell (down) Last week: 7
This is how you can tell a high-quality mistress: Even if you leave her hiding in the car for a couple of hours, without explanation, without a rescue attempt, she figures out that the jig is up and shows herself home instead of cluelessly knocking on the front door to find out what's taking you so long in there. She just knows. She's been through this enough times.
9. Greg Harris (up) Last week: unranked
No brains in his fingers, no brains in his head. And, you know, after his basic training and a quick residency in NY, they'll probably just send him to Germany or Vietnam or something. Vietnam, hopefully, because all the messiness will be over by the time he gets there. He hears it's pretty in Vietnam, he and Joanie can have a nice extended vacation in Hanoi! Sounds like a plan, nothing could possibly go wrong.
10. Focus Group Guy With The French Bulldog (up) Last week: unranked
"It's ponies! Caldecott Farms is made out of ponies! They're making our dogs' food out of ponies! Next thing they'll be breeding us like ponies for dog food. You've gotta tell them. You've gotta tell them!" [He runs off, slams door, scares the other dogs.]
Not ranked: Pete Campbell, Sal Romano, Paul Kinsey, Harry Crane, Bert Cooper, Caldecott Farms Black Beauty™ flavor; Hobo-bby Draper, Connie Hilton, Donald Draper, Peter Lorre.
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Comments
This week Roger finally earned the #3.
I still think we need a MatricideWatch to go along with the PatricideWatch. Betty isn't going to want Sally to comfort her the way she answers the phone.
Ponies, its made of ponies people!
don draper is like a reverse tony montana, even when he is telling you the truth, he's lying.
I was stuck waiting for the big Alpo reveal.
These should be printed, bound and included with the season three DVD/Blu-Ray Set. And I'd like to ask you to please go back and do power rankings for all the season one and two episodes. The Movieline Mad Men Power Rankings are why the Internet was invented.
I'd like to request that you use a new photo of Sally -- maybe it's just the chin angle, but this one smacks disturbingly of Shelley Winters. May I suggest a new photo of her in her gypsy finery?
I laughed so hard at Miss Farrell being left in the car all night.
I agree with Busterbluth!! Please, please, please, go back and do the power rankings for the previous two seasons! A dvd insert would be great...I bet you would get offered a position at Sterling Cooper in the Creative Department reporting directly into Don! You would fit right in!
I've been meaning to archive both this "Mad Men" column and the one at "The Onion" to hardcopy, so that in the future I would be able to reread the reviews after watching old episodes on disc. If earlier episodes could be written up here also that would bookend the series so nicely.