Mad Men Power Rankings, Week Seven: 'What Are You Laughing At, Cadillac?'

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2. Roger Sterling (even) Last week: 2

You know who's really sick and tired of The Face Of The Business's "this place was nothing before me, is nothing without me" act? Well, pretty much everyone. But Roger Sterling in particular, that's who. Right from the beginning, when Don blanched after being informed that his contractual status had to be firmed up to close the Hilton account, bullshitting, "I've gotten to know Connie Hilton. I think he'll enjoy something he can't have," Rog knew he really was talking about the two guys with their names on the firm's wall. And so he rang up Betty, knowing that a simple Jedi mind trick would get her to do the heavy lifting for him and further antagonize Don. Afterward, we'd like to think he headed over to Angelo's for a touch-up manicure, muttering something about, "I'll show you what's effeminate, guy. Getting harangued by your bored wife about job stuff, that's pretty effeminate, bub."

Sat behind Don's desk in a subtle power-play: No.

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3. Peggy Olsen (up) Last week: 9

Wooed, smacked down, and go-arounded to within an inch of her newly liberated, city-girl life, it was a big, big week for Peggy. Big week!

Compare and contrast:

Don to Peggy: "You were my secretary. And now you have an office, and a job, that a lot of full-grown men would kill for. Every time I turn around you have your hand in my pocket. You want a raise, you want this account. Put your nose down and pay attention to your work. Because there's not one thing you've done here that I couldn't live without." And: "You're good. Get better. Stop asking for things. Close the door."

Duck Phillips to Peggy: "I want to take you in that bedroom, lock the door, take your clothes off with my teeth, throw you on the bed, and give you a go-around like you've never had." With his teeth! Impregnatin' Pete Campbell never worked kinky teeth-play into his game while trying to get between Peggy's legs. Nor did the dum-dum from the bar. Or anyone she's ever slept with, apparently. But Duck knows Peggy's worth it. And he's willing to tell the hotel cleaning lady to scram until he's finished nibbling his way through her entire wardrobe.

Sat behind Don's desk in a subtle power-play: No. (But cried in front of it, a little.)

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4. Betty Draper (up) Last week: 5

What's this? Betty's standing up to Don? Sure, Rog was using her as a puppet. But she didn't back down when Don tried to end the contract conversation by condescendingly barking, "Let me explain something to you about business, since as usual you're turning this into something about yourself. No contract means I have all the power. They want me, but they can't have me." Instead, she volleyed back with a withering, "You're right. Why would I think that has anything to do with me? It's three years, Don. What's the matter, you think you don't know where you're going to be in three years?" Of course, after Don stormed out to begin his ill-fated bender, Betty was probably dragging anxiously on a cigarette while staring out a window and wondering how exactly she wound up in front of this window anxiously puffing on a cigarette after pumping out three kids for a distant, vaguely dissatisfied husband, but we still have to applaud her feistiness. Even if her newfound spine was fortified by the attention of a certain smitten consultant who could boost her standing within the Junior League.

Sat behind Don's desk in a subtle power-play: N/A. But she did buy an ugly, decor-destroying antique sofa because it reminds her of the tingly feeling she had while window-shopping with Henry Francis.

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Comments

  • Portmanteautally says:

    Finally, the Power Rankings! I can exhale now...

  • Blackcapricorn says:

    I was waiting all day for these- great job again!
    Can someone please kidnap Weiner and force him to write the "clothes-chomping vs. fingerbanging showdown" we all desperately want to see?
    In addition to the fingerbang threat level (which I think, despite the verbal dressing down, is actually at "blackwatch plaid") please keep us updated on the Patricide Watch. The Sally fanfic is really one the best parts of my Mondays.

  • princesscarrie says:

    Betty did sit behind Don's desk at home while arranging a Jr. League tryst. She even tried the locked drawers.

  • Robenoir says:

    I'm actually starting to enjoy the power rankings, and particularly the Fingerbang Threat Level, even more than the show itself.

  • XCI says:

    Were we watching the same scene with Ms. Farrell, the teacher?
    Her legs didn't snap shut, as you put it. I saw a flirtatious teacher who has grown accustomed to the dads hitting on her, she revels in it. Then Don subtly threw it back in her face, but, ah, this was still flirting, but on his terms. Don is being cautious with this one, and the teacher is intrigued. Don is intrigued too, now.

  • nojo says:

    I'm willing to join a class-action suit against Lisanti for lodging the thought of Pete/Duck slashfic into our collective heads, where it stubbornly refuses to unlodge.

  • MaJean says:

    I liked when she called Don out on his shit (although she could've done it better), something about "you all are all the same". He likes to think he is above everyone but this week he got owned by everyone. I just wished Sally or Roger got in on the action. Now he really wouldn't be expecting that.

  • jdubs says:

    Betty did sit behind Don's desk in a subtle power play... in his home office, where she rattles the drawer that frustrated her so very much last season. In fact, isn't this the subtlest bureau-related power play of them all?

  • Rebecca says:

    I think Sally Draper PatricideWatch will be in full swing once she finds her psycho teacher and her father going at it in an empty classroom.

  • el smrtmnky says:

    sometimes you're the sun and sometimes you're the satellite doing the upstaging.

  • sweetbiscuit says:

    Don't forget, also unranked this week: Sacagawea and her self-delusional papoose!

  • bbblnbrown says:

    I know...I was refreshing my page all day at work yesterday!!

  • I think you forgot to put the negative sign in front of the "1" for Don this week. He got owned. He's just lucky Joan's husband wasn't around to rape him.

  • Paolo says:

    Miss Ho-rrelly doesn't ring the same alarum bells as Bobbie, but she's still trouble. Nonetheless Don should accept her advances because the man seriously needs to get laid.

  • Not Mad Man says:

    Sally knows it's important to wash your hands... of what though?
    (Insinuating blood)

  • A.C. Senray says:

    Nitpick:
    Peggy: "Stop coming in here and infecting me with your anxiety."

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