The Big Balls Are Back

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Honesty is almost always refreshing, but truth in programming is difficult to come by these days. Not so with summer favorite Wipeout, an obstacle course game show lacking even the basic pretension that its challenges require a semblance of athletic ability.

Wipeout [8 PM, ABC]

John Anderson and John Henson return to anchor the snark-coverage of people making wet, muddy fools of themselves as they compete for 50 large. On the contestant side, new obstacles like the Sweeper Gyro and a Bridge Too Far await a diverse set of outgoing individuals who could make it to the LA area and sign what must be extensive waiver paperwork.

Tattoo Highway [10 PM, A&E]

Thomas Pendleton, a Los Angeles tattoo artist with a Wall Street i-banker name, takes his parlor tour bus on the road. In the first of two episodes, Pendleton inks a phoenix onto a woman in Vegas. In the second episode, Pendleton marks a man with an image of his deceased wife before revisiting his high school in Reno. Meanwhile, not on TV, a bunch of dudes from the North Shore of Long Island get Chinese characters inked on their shoulders and then drive around Manhattan in a cramped BMW 3 Series blasting the new Eminem album.

Late Night with Jimmy Fallon [12:35 AM, NBC]

Guests: Brooke Shields, Chris Hardwick, Kris Allen, The-Dream. Fallon finally has a guest who is in the news and could potentially talk about hot button rumors, but we doubt Brooke Shields will be addressing the Kiefer issue. We imagine the Fallon research department caught this item, and we are hoping for an awkward segue from the "What have you been up to lately?" topic to "What took you so long to do it?"

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Gridlock'd [12 AM, Sundance]

Russell Simmons had a hand in producing this strange crime-action film that follows a day or so in the life of musicians Spoon (Tupac Shakur) and Stretch (Tim Roth) as they decide to get off the smack after their friend Cookie (Thandie Newton) overdoses. Cops and criminals get involved, but the real heavy is the inefficient bureaucracy of government medical programs.



Comments

  • Long time reader, first time commenter says:

    MXC is much better. Especially high.

  • Old No.7 says:

    You know how to make every episode of Wipeout that much more awesome? Fantasize that every contestant is Katherine Heigl.

  • gadge says:

    OMFG! Celebrity Wipeout would be AMAZING!

  • Dhppy says:

    I think the whole point of watching Wipeout is to figure out the exact angle at which the neck can bend before immediate paralysis ensues.

  • CiscoMan says:

    Don't know what's worse about Wipeout: the forced snark or the fact that they can't even be bothered to record said forced snark live. Or that the Mercury Spokesperson/Sideline Reporter has to "toss it back" to the forced snarky guys who aren't even there. Or... nevermind.

  • sweetbiscuit says:

    Turning the sound completely off helps, too.