Our Commenters of the Week Win Second Place!

Normally, we'd award the best commenters of the week a winning trophy of some sort, but you don't want to get locked into that restrictive first place contract, do you? No, you want to be free to pursue a career of whatever comments you want to make, not those that are forced upon you by the top brass. Really, it's a blessing that we've given you second place -- even if it's only because of all those COTW votes that arrived en masse from Arkansas (who knew?).

Here, then, are the five best comments:

· icallthebigonebitey on Six Burning Questions For Tonight's Idol Finale Face-Off: "Look, anyone who's ever seen the movie Carrie knows exactly how this is going to go down tomorrow, okay? As soon as Adam is presented with her sash and tiara, Gokey and Sarver (carefully concealed under the stage) will prepare to dump the bucket o' pig's blood all over Adam's Evil Knievel/Anne Murray approved pantsuit. Alison (in the Amy Irving role) will realize what's going on seconds too late, as the blood comes splashing down atop Madame Lambert's jet black, emo-Alfalfa 'do. Then chaos, fire, (and hopefully) sparkly, glittery telekinesis will rain down upon the audience, destroying the judges and this awful, awful television program once and for all.

With Ryan Seacrest as Betty Buckley."

· dollywould on The Nine Best Reaction Videos to Adam Lambert's Defeat: "God, I am so glad there wasn't a camera on me when Jaslene won America's Next Top Model."

· NoWireHangers on First New Moon Poster: Who Wants Who?: "Just looking at these pictures unleashes my long-buried 14-year-old self. There's got to be a copy of Seventeen Magazine around here somewhere. I'm feeling faint and an article about how to create 'smokey eyes' in time for the 7th grade dance is the only solution."

· CiscoMan on Is the Fat Kid from Up Asian?: "We Filipinos will shamelessly claim anybody (Vanessa Hudgens FTW?), so I'm just gonna say Russell is Filipino. Even if the voice actor has a Japanese surname. We don't care, we really don't. Lou Diamond Philips, anybody? Tia Carrere? Thank you."

· JudgeFudge on Dan Aykroyd Wants Ghostbusters 3 For Christmas: "Come on, if we're going to have a Ghostbusters 3, we need to have the Ghostbusters-pass-on-the-torch-to-the-Apatow-crew movie that we've all been waiting for. Bill Murray is mentor to Paul Rudd. Dan Akroyd is mentor to Seth Rogen. Harold Ramis is mentor to Michael Cera. Ernie Hudson is mentor to Craig Robinson. Rick Moranis is mentor to McLovin. Slimer is mentor to Jonah Hill. Come one, let's get $150 million together and get this thing in the theatres!"

Congratulations to our winners!