Calm Before The Storm

The easy headline here is Jon & Kate Plus Hate, because that rhymes and stuff, so look for that to pop up everywhere in the coming months as this situation spirals out of control. The new season of Jon & Kate Plus 8 premieres on Monday, but TLC primes the pump tonight with a few episodes from the happy days, the salad days, as they say.

Jon & Kate Plus 8: Surviving Sextuplets and Twins [5 PM, TLC]

As a helpful TLC press person informed us, they are shooting the season premiere as you read this, so look for this season to have drama juicier than Aaden missing his toy giraffe or Collin trying to learn to potty. While that premiere on Monday will undoubtedly establish a ratings apex for the show, the numbers should be decent for the reruns leading up to it. Tonight's mini-marathon re-introduces us to Jon & Kate Gosselin, and the way they were pre-tummy tuck, pre-hair transplant, pre-alleged mistress with the special noted above. Then at 6 PM, we get Sextuplets and Twins: One Year Later followed by a bunch of rerun episodes. It's a primer for the uninitiated or a reminder of innocence lost for the experienced.

Don't Forget the Lyrics [8 PM, Fox]

It's hard to appreciate Wayne Brady in a non-ironic fashion, but we'll give him credit for snagging this gig and keeping it. This is the second season finale, thus they bring out the big guns: Meatloaf and his daughter, who will compete for their favorite charities. In a perfect world, this show would be much more sadistic, but then Wayne Brady would have to go back to television improv shows.

Late Show with David Letterman [11:35 PM, CBS]

Guests: Ricky Gervais, comedian Pete Correale, Green Day. According to thirty seconds of research we just did, Ricky Gervais has been on the show five times in the last year. That's a lot of dry, absurd humor, but it's better than booking starlets and serious actor-types. Hopefully, Green Day doesn't play "Know Your Enemy" because that song is super-repetitive. How about a deep cut? Perhaps "East Jesus Nowhere"?

Blue Crush [10 PM, Bravo]

When the script and acting start to get annoying in this film, John Stockwell's command of the image and cinematographer David Hennings's control of light (especially below and above the ocean) saves this from being just a surfer girl movie. The simple story - hardcore surfer Anne Marie Chadwick (Kate Bosworth) falls for jock quarterback Matt Tollman (Matthew Davis) and that causes all sorts of coming of age issues - is all that is needed to justify beautiful moments of cinema like Bosworth's character running on the bottom of the ocean or slicing through a wave.