Why Adam Lambert Lost: A Movieline Debate
Adam Lambert lost to Kris Allen on American Idol last night, but the more important issue is, what does that say about the world we live in now? (Besides the fact that I totally called it?) To debate this heavy question, S.T. VanAirsdale and I argued in a provocative, intermittently capitalized IM exchange. Here, then, are our thoughts on the South, homophobia, and elaborately realized shoulder latticework:
STV: if we accept the voting results at face value (i.e. not influenced by the network/record company), how much do you think his defeat was a reaction of the god-fearing Gokey/Allen crowds to Lambert as a Big Threatening Gay?
KB: some but not all?
like, Kris is a super cute version of many people who are currently pop stars, including last year's Idol
so he's a pretty easy choice
and the number-three guy who was eliminated was definitely drawing a kris-type audience
STV: i really felt like it was a Political Moment
the South Will Rise Again, etc etc
KB: you and everyone on facebook
STV: and not just the south
from which some massive percentage of the votes reportedly emerged
but also the pro-Gokey evangelicals
avenging their boy
it seems like loaded dice
KB: in this scenario, is Kris Allen the film Crash?
Everyone is drawing Prop 8 parallels, but this is so totes Brokeback/Crash to me.
STV: i dunno, maybe?
except that Brokeback had taste
and Adam Lambert wore latticework shoulder accessories and platform boots
KB: i did like the latticework, i must say
does that mean i should go to burning man this year?
STV: latticework is the new black
KB: haha, the umpteenth huffpo editorial on the subject:
"Jim David: Adam Lambert Loses, Homophobia Wins"
people are taking this so hard!
go back and watch Glee on your DVRs, people
STV: of course this whole debate doesn't take into account the very real problem that Adam Lambert CAN'T SING
KB: yes, you've put yourself in the interesting position of defending a singer you don't actually like
STV: can he shriek like a banshee? hell yes
can he command a room? yes
but again, assuming this is a pure democracy and not industry politics, maybe people just voted for the guy they could listen to on the radio
which doesn't explain archuleta losing last year, but hey
KB: well, this is Idol. the music bona fides are not enormous
like, the two singers with Steve Martin were terrible. and yet Idol would have you believe that they are among the top 10 singers they could find in america
they're not even the top two singers i could find in my local karaoke bar
STV: then there's the theory suggesting Idol did Lambert a favor
by not anchoring him to a contract
KB: well, they definitely did him a favor by not releasing his version of the terrible winner's single
but when you think about the music adam's going to make
doesn't that just point out why kris probably won?
i'm sure adam's music will be interesting
throwback glam classic rock
but what is like that on the radio right now?
whereas kris is very john mayer, jason mraz, rob matchbox 20
STV: it's true that Adam is more of an interpreter, for better or worse
but how far can you take that with original music
KB: he'll draw some interesting songwriters to him
i suppose he could be kind of like Muse?
he just doesn't want to veer off too far and become The Darkness
STV: do we want to attribute that kind of credit to American Idol voters?
that this was in fact a victory for art?
that Adam in fact won?
in the long run?
KB: i guess we'll have to see how things take shape
i mean, he got really far. so that's a testament to the same voters who are being derided
if you believe in adam as art
can i just say that EW interviewed him today and this was the exchange:
I want to just get this question out of the way first, something that's been dangling a bit over you for the whole season: Would you like to put to rest all the speculation about your sexuality?
It's not dangling over my head. [Laughing] It may be dangling over yours, but it's not over mine. Yeah, I think speculation keeps things really interesting.
So you don't want to say anything one way or the other?
Like I said, I think speculation keeps things very, very interesting. [Laughs]
KB: ok, first of all, EW
the actual question would be, "Are you gay?"
not, "Hmmm, do you want to even talk about this, maybe?"
Don't be a pussy, EW
second of all, Lambert, come on.
"speculation keeps things very, very interesting"
grow some balls
jesus
we already have a Mika
and we don't really care about him
anyway!
STV: go easy on the guy
it's not as though he can go out and buy nads retail like Bikini Girl buys tits
KB: zing!
STV: anyway indeed
thanks for nothing America
at least we'll always have norman gentle
KB: and you know what else we'll have?
real music
performed by people who wrote it
so go listen to that, america
STV: amen, son
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Comments
Way more interesting or valid than any IM exchange I've ever taken part in.
I look it at this way: if ConstantPreen can get a Tony nomination, then anyone who cracks the top 10 has a shot at doing quite well for themselves. And, Adam is the most interesting non-winner in... well... ever. (We all saw how poor Kris was essentially used as a ramp for Adam to jump off and hit the high notes on "We Are The Champions") So, his post idol career should be phenomenal.
Great commentary you guys. You should make this a regular feature.
As much I hate Adam's over-the-top style (and "style" might be too generous), as soon as heard Crystal Allen MASSACRING my beloved Bill Withers and (AND!) Marvin Gaye on Tuesday night with his trademark laid-back (re: snooze-inducing) warbling, I was ready to hand Ms. Lambert the crown just out of spite.
What is this, 1998? Do people still believe that the network actually counts the votes? (Sigh) It's like the people still holding on to the idea that TRL wasn't entirely rigged because of that one time an 80s vid got voted on via Internet Meme. Doesn't matter that they put it on the day after it was top-voted, because an intern got the email...
Jesus, people, man up. there is no Santa Claus, there is no Easter Bunny, and American Idol has nothing to do with voting! That's just a way for AT&T to make money.
Nice commentary. You know what I'm still wondering about - Is Adam Lambert skinny, or what? He's tall, for certain, but he seems to have a bit of a gut that his wardrobe is perfectly designed to cover, what with the stiff leather jackets and concealing dark colors.
Believe me - I'm not anti-gut. I just wish that if he did have a gut, he wasn't such a pansy about it. Might have won my vote, anyway.
Isn't American Idol like everything else, in that people ask themselves one question:
"Who would I rather wake up next to?"
Even closetcase dudes would vote for Kris, because Adam reminds them too much of the gaybro they actually DID wake up next to that one time, initiating their self-hate/disgust mechanism.
I honestly believe Adam's loss was more the result of Kris Allen's tween crush appeal and non-threatening wholesomeness than America's homophobia. Kris was the safe choice. Adam made you tingly in dark places, and maybe America felt a little funny about that. Kris better fit the Idol mold of mediocre shit. Adam was the best contestant that has ever been on the show. He was also the presumed winner for several weeks, so there was the whole tortoise/hare factor. I'm sure the tweens (and Seth) are still bitter about the Shaved Koala upset of 2008--and thus made sure to dial for Kris until their Tinkerbell polish was worn thin. This is probably better for Adam anyway. Now he can really let his glitter cock hang out and won't be muzzled by Idol expectations of vanilla pop. His wiry shoulder pads and goth boots during the KISS duet were just a taste of the wonders Dear Lambert may have in store for us. Merkins? Duets with Peaches? Demonschlong shadow puppetry? All are possibilities...
Let's be honest if Adam Lambert was a straight dude doing the exact same performances in the exact same outfits he would of been gone two months ago. The is he or isn't he talk made him some what interesting. He's got his shtick and that's about it. Kris isn't that great in my book, but he is much easier to market to tweens. I could just see Adam being a diva like old Soul Patrol seemed was a couple years ago. Well I hope Adam gets the Proactiv campaign it really hasn't been the same since Jessica Simpson used to hawk it.
I've read that the requirements for the second-place contract are more restrictive that the winner's contract, so in that theory, no one did him any favors. On the other hand, he'll make more money this year than I will, so I'm not losing sleep over poor poor Adam.
I really think the show/Fox is the one stirring up all these theories -- anything to try to boost PR and ratings (which were down this year). Face it folks: it's a cheap, flashy singing contest, and it has jumped the shark.
(I did enjoy the above IM exchange, however!)
Hey, Lambert>> Cheer up! You can always be Frank N Furter in the touring company of “Rocky Horror Picture Show”!!
Are 10 year old girls inherently homophobic? I just don't think they are..sure Adam appealed to many, he made the top two!, but Kris obviously appealed to a few more.
personally, i'm glad America put the kibosh on Lambert's wailing what-the-fuckery. American Idol never knows what to do with ethnics, oldies, blackies, fatties or the otherwise fringe-y and Adam is just the perfect storm of all that no thank you. And while Kris might be muppet-mouthed (adorably so at that), Adam looks like he's having an uncommissioned bowel movement whenever he sings. All the glitter and pokemon bangs in the world won't make that a good music video.
I'm more troubled by the upset on Dancing with the Stars (or the "Dancing with the somewhat recognizable" as it was renamed) GILES WAS ROBBED
Well, the bottom line is that Kris has a readily identifiable audience, where as Adam does not have a clear market for his over the top Glam Rock (Make-up, hair, black nails)style. Adam would be a great lead singer for Poison or perhaps Dead or Alive.
better dead than alive. his career i mean.
For those all of you who does not like ADAM LAMBRERT, well, i feel sooooorry, you are all just jealous w/ ADAM's TALENT....
Adam is still the Best.....It does'nt matter he did not get the TITLE. he is already a WINNER.....Adam is already a ROCK STAR,....move over Michael Jackson.....or Guns & ROSES....
Good post! But American Idol has proven over the years that the brightest star probably isn't crowned the Americn Idol. I have some the same views on my Adam Lambert post:
http://soul88.blogspot.com/2009/05/man-who-fell-to-earth-night-adam.html
Yup, figured it'd be slanted that Adam lost because he was gay. Not because people don't want to listen to screeching for 50 minutes on album or that Danny's votes almost all went to Kris (because they're similar). Adam would be great in theater, hearing him on an album is not the same as seeing him on Idol. See: Taylor Hicks, See: Fantasia Barrino.
Ugh, if by "did a favor for art" you mean, gave wannabe-faux-rebels a fake Man to feel like they could stand against, then yes, yes that is exactly what American Idol accomplished.
Yay more fake culture wars to make people upset and feel oppressed on both sides! It's such a bunch of hooey.
People like different things. Adam is not that edgy! Being gay is not exciting in and of itself!! Kris is probably not that uber-clean-cut, and that doesn't make him boring or untalented at the end of the day, necessarily.
But I don't really know. I've never seen a full episode of American Idol. Blah.
And stop blaming "tweens" for everything. It's becoming code for anything awesome that tons of people over 13 are clearly buying into, hence its success.
it's simple. Adam was leading until Danny Gokey got voted off. most of Danny's votes went to Kris which sent him over the top.
I don't think it is necessary to ask Jackson and G&R to "move over" as they have already fallen off the proverbial cliff.
I don't doubt Adam's singing or wailing talents. He's damn entertaining and that's exactly what we need these days: entertainers. I'm tired of all the one-note wonders out there. Bring on the triple-threats! Adam was born to be on the stage and nothing proved this better than the variety show format of Idol--especially the finale. What he needs--after acting and dancing bootcamp--is a glitter rock musical: perhaps a Broadway version of the film Velvet Goldmine? I can imagine people flocking to see him in something like that. Then, of course, he'll need to stretch himself creatively with something more challenging--maybe start with a small role in an action film like will.i.am did in Wolverine and then, maybe, a period film? Whatever he chooses, music, theater, or film, he'll have to work especially hard to carve out his niche and maintain a consistent fan base. And Adam, run, don't walk to the phone when John Galliano calls.
You lost me at the point you said Adam cant sing. Your opinion is in the minority and feels utterly foolish. You sound like a narrow-taste jerk and the rest of your trying tobe funny commentary wasnt worth the effort.