At Cannes: In a Down Economy, Up Kicks Things Off

Amidst hazy and humid weather, the 62nd Cannes Film Festival officially opened today with a black-tie, evening screening of the Disney/Pixar film Up, directed by Peter Docter. Both pomp and circumstance were in high demand as thousands of cheering French people welcomed a gaggle of (mainly French) celebrities who vamped on the red carpet — perhaps this festival is the only time the black-tie-wearing paparazzi ever shout "Agnès" in trying to get racy snapshots of French director Agnès Varda.

Although journalists rarely attend these screenings, I somehow managed to snag a last-minute invite to the big dance. The excitement of holding that shiny silver ticket in my hand was tempered when I arrived back at my apartment and realized I left my tux at home. Luckily I have a solid black suit, so I threw that on, but alas, no black tie. Again, ingenuity: I had a solid back neck tie. I sprinted unshowered (as I have yet to figure out how to turn on the water heater) to the Palais du Festival. The throngs of locals were packed outside, hoping to get a glimpse of Charles Aznavour! (And maybe some American celebrities.)

As I approached the red carpet an elderly French grandmother type yelled, "Stop," which of course put the gendarmes on high alert. My necktie wasn't sufficient and threatened the sanctity and tradition of the festival itself. She had a solution, naturally. For 15 euros, I could purchase a clip-on black tie. Included in the price was grandma's shaky hands wrapped around my sweaty neck, helping me put it on. Emasculated and feeling like I was 6 years old, I headed for the red carpet just behind Tilda Swinton, who, as always steals the show with her butch, is-she-a-guy-no-matter-she's-hot presence.

Hobnobbing and posing for a solid, dense pack of paparazzi were Swinton, the almost-freakishly attractive Aishwarya Rai, and the jury, which consists of president Isabelle Huppert (a French version of Mia Farrow), Robin Wright Penn (who's still being introduced as such despite the potential divorce), Sharmila Tagore, Asia Argento, Shu Qi, Nuri Bilge Ceylan, James Gray, Hanif Kureishi, and Lee Changdong. The celebrities were ringed by a phalanx of diminutive middle-school-aged ballerinas, posing statue-like.

After an hour of arrivals came another hour of speeches and a song (!) by Bryan Ferry. Next up: A full-view dismantling of the Greek/Roman revival-themed stage, complete with two French women vacuuming. Much like learning how hot dogs are made, breaking down a stage in full view of the audience is totally unsettling.

Finally the audience donned its high-tech 3-D goggles and the film began. And as a film, Up is totally fitting with the Pixar brand. Of course, the animation is excellent, but the 3-D effects offer little enhancement (My Bloody Valentine in 3-D it ain't) — Pixar animation can stand on its own and shouldn't need to rely on the marketing gimmick that 3-D offers.

What are most interesting about the film, however, are its subject matter and the time in which it's released (May 29 in the U.S.). Carl (voice of Ed Asner) is a widowed, 78-year-old balloon salesman who decides to take his home on an aerial journey rather than selling it to greedy, urban developers. Throughout his life Carl never was able to give his wife the adventures they so dreamed about, so rather than getting shipped off to an old-folks home, Carl up and leaves and tries to right his wrong.

For the first half of the film, the fealty shown by Carl to his house is eerie. Could the myriad helium balloons attached to the home represent the struggle of homeowners to prevent their homes from going into foreclosure? Whoa, Disney, seriously? The real estate bubble taking the form of balloons? Okay, so it's probably purely unintentional, but the film literally becomes an animated version of the current mortgage and economic meltdown.

The second half of the film takes on a more conventional good-versus-evil story, with a little bit of environmental activism thrown in. But as the action really heats up, I kept asking myself, Were these writers stoned to the bejesus belt? The animal characters in the film — a giant, wild, and colorful bird a la Toucan Sam, dogs who speak in voices reminiscent of the dwarf in Twin Peaks — surely couldn't have been dreamt up without ingesting a whole host of mind-altering substances.

Toward the end of the film, Carl says, "It's just a house." If only people who are being foreclosed on could say the same thing. Rating (out of 10): 7.5